


Satvius Academy 3: The Second Experiment

by ScifiRice



Series: Satvius Academy [3]
Category: Satvius Academy
Genre: Boarding School, College, Original Characters - Freeform, Original Fiction, Religious Themes, Supernatural - Freeform, Superpowers, arranged mairrage, forced transformation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:15:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 32,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24194161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScifiRice/pseuds/ScifiRice
Summary: Toby finds himself the unwilling subject of a strange procedure. Will he succumb to it, or will he overcome it?
Series: Satvius Academy [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1533755





	1. Plights of the Past and Present

It’s a cloudy Sunday morning in Ingle. The people here are up and about as usual. I go outside and see a trio of elderly birds going on a walk down the street. The grandmother from down the street drives by with her young grandkids to take them to breakfast. Various grey-haired folk all sitting on their porches sipping some kind of beverage or nibbling on something to fill their stomachs.

Ingle is a very popular place for retirees. The cool weather and distance from the larger towns has some kind of appeal to them. Barely anyone here is below middle-age. One would think the lack of younger people would mean most of the town would just die off eventually and leave no one here. But I’ll be damned, these houses just don’t stay empty long enough for that to happen.

Ambulance sirens are a frequent sound heard in the distance. Some old person suddenly getting sick or just not waking up. They die or leave, and their homes are sold and re-inhabited in no time. This place must have one hell of a reputation among retirees if so many come here.

However, this is not the case with my family. My mother is gone and my father raised me alone for most of my life. Eventually a great-uncle of mine died and left my dad his home in the will. Fully paid off, nice neighborhood, great location. No way would he have refused.

I was ten when I first moved here. And it was here that I met my best friend. My neighbor and the only one I knew my age. Marwha Shinsain.

Her mother had their family move here before she was born. She’s some kind of religious official and needed to be close to where her job required her to be. It didn’t take long for Marwha and me to become friends. For the most part, we were our only friends too.

I went to school on the edge of town. I didn’t have much luck making friends. Especially when my blessing showed up. At least when word gets around how your blessing had to be registered as a potential weapon, people stop picking on you. But regular people also become afraid of you.

Marwha didn’t have much luck making friends either. But that’s for a different reason. She’s volatile and not many know she can be nasty when she wants to. Achal claims she gets it from their father.

Point is, for most of our lives, outside of family, we never really had anyone else to be with. But that is going to change soon. Because we both got the opportunity of a lifetime. We had both been recently accepted into Satvius Academy. Marwha got in on account of her grades and her family’s history with the college. I had applied with her, not as certain as she was that I would get in. But apparently I was accepted too.

I see Marwha sitting on the grass in front of her home. I walk over and sit beside her. We both don’t know much about Satvius other than that it’s the top college for the entire territory ruled by The Grand Design. But Achal has already spent a year there and he seems to be enjoying it. Not to mention during his summer vacation at home he has been talking over the phone constantly with some girl named Dacia who he met at Satvius.

Honestly, the news that we were accepted was the best thing we heard in years. The isolation we felt here was suffocating. None of these old people had any interest in hanging out with a couple of people our age. Anyone young enough to be in the same generation as us is only here temporarily, usually to visit their aging relatives. But now we had a chance to finally get out of this place.

“So…. Your family has quite the history with this school doesn’t it?” I said to Marwha as she leans against a planter.  
“Mainly on my mother’s side yeah. Though my dad’s family has been going there a good deal too. I was pretty much guaranteed to go there. My high grades and coming from a family of almost all alumni really helped.” She said.  
“You can’t brag about your grades. Your blessing helps too much.” I said.  
“I try not to use it all the time! As long as the schools don’t know it can help give me the answers to the tests, I’m set.” She said with a smirk.  
“But you still use it for math right?” I said.  
“Oh gods yeah. Once math classes start being fair, I’ll stop cheating on every test.” She said.  
“Fair enough…. I’m just hoping I’ll find someone I can be as open to as I am with you.” I said.  
“To be fair, you didn’t have many options.” She said jokingly.  
“Hey, that goes both ways.” I said.  
“But anyway. I imagine you could. My parents met at that school. As did my grandparents.” She said.  
“Maybe it’s something about that school that just makes good couples.” I said.  
“Honestly. I wouldn’t mind if I came out of there with someone special.” She said.  
“I’m hoping I do.” I said.

I open my eyes, staring at the dull-red ceiling of my dorm room. She was so optimistic about this place back then. Why no one told her about the arranged marriages is beyond me. Now she’s spending every available moment here trying to stop it.

Arno is a nice guy. I’d hate to agree with Achal’s insistence, but Marwha and Arno would be good together. Yet they are both unable to get past the fact it wasn’t their choice. She told me the deacons who run the college are trying to convince the higher ups who arrange the marriages to break them up. Even after the whole cult incident, they are still dragging their feet on the whole matter. It’s our third year at Satvius Academy. We have two more left before graduation when the marriage is to take place. The cult incident happened halfway through the first year. One would think they would have done something by now. But that’s Marwha’s problem with the school. Mine is the opposite.

When we were accepted, they asked us to visit a religious center in a nearby town for a medical checkup. Someone there had some strange medical blessing that let them identify pretty much everything about us by touch. They said it was some kind of legal requirement of theirs to do these tests. Didn’t even tell us what they found.

We also were asked to undergo a psychological evaluation. They gave us this fifty question multiple-choice test with each question asking some kind of ethical or moral question. No real wrong answers, just a list of opinions. Well whatever was on that test screwed me over. I was declared as having a personality unfit for matching with any of the other students in our class. So I was given this dorm all to myself. They said if a student transfers and has a personality that goes well with mine, they would pair us together. But I doubt that will happen.

You end up not getting paired or alone for a few reasons here. Having an unfit personality like me, proving to not be fit for your current partner, and if you are gay or asexual. At least the gay and ace students get roommates with others like them. I’m stuck in this room alone night after night.

When you’re paired up, you’re allowed to do all the things young-adult couples do. Gay students are allowed to be with whoever as long as they aren’t part of an established pair. But people like me and those pairs that are broken up? We’re actually not allowed to pursue a close relationship with anyone inside or outside of the school. Allegedly to avoid the drama of having an existing relationship while getting paired up with someone again.

Yeah I’ve made a few real friends here. Passeri and Scott being some of the best non-Marwha friends I ever had. Yet they’re both paired up with some great people too and it only makes me envious. But they’re both good people regardless.

Passeri is paired up with a tree frog named Nayara. She’s one of those brightly colored frogs that are specifically told not to pursue relationships with others of their kind since that could lead to their offspring being the kind of frog that secretes toxins from their skin. And that’s not fun for all parties involved. She shares Passeri’s love for music despite not seeming interested in playing any instruments herself.

Scott is paired up with a mountain lion named Laxmi. She’s the complete opposite of the perpetually nervous and tired Scott. She’s energetic and outgoing at all times. Yet they get along perfectly, she’s trying to help him control his blessing more. That’s one aspect of Scott I am not envious of. Having a blessing you can’t control is the worst. Thank the gods I was able to get the hang of mine so quickly.

Gravity manipulation is a strange power to have. I can mentally crush people’s bones if I’m not careful. But my power is more than just switching gravity in a 20 foot radius around me. I create small localized fields of gravity which I choose the range and strength of. Someone once asked if it was like having telekinesis. It is not, this power is less like grabbing onto things with your mind and more like getting to choose which direction something is thrown in. I don’t have very fine control over it. I can’t open a bottle with my powers alone. Also I can’t make a gravitational field less than an inch in diameter.

Then there is the matter of the strength of the gravity I create. According to what Marwha’s blessing can gather, the maximum strength is my physical strength multiplied by some amount. What that amount is I never really looked into. I’m far from being able to flatten a car with my blessing. And I actually refrain from much strength training because I’m honestly afraid of getting stronger than I already am. At least decreasing gravity is easier. I can’t shut it off entirely, but I can get pretty close.

My father has a similar blessing. He could control how gravity affected his own body. Make himself weightless and such. My mother could telekinetically launch things in whatever direction she wanted. My blessing is simply a perfect blend of them both.

Thinking about my mother is beginning to put me in an uncomfortable mood. I shake my head and sit up. I look around my dorm. It’s a mess, clothes and various items scattered everywhere. The cleanest spot in this dorm is the top bunk which hasn’t been slept in since I arrived at the academy.

I never really need to clean. I’m the only one who is ever here. Save for the times when Marwha comes over to hang out. I wonder if she’s back from classes yet? I could use something to cheer me up right about now. I stand up and pull out my phone. It’s 2 PM. She’s not out of class yet.

No matter. I have other friends. Scott should be at his dorm by now. Maybe I can hang out with him for a bit. Or at the very least, Laxmi can use her blessing on me.

Scott is on the other side of the building from me. A short two-minute long walk and I’m there. I knock on the door and ask if I can come in. Laxmi says the door is unlocked and to come in. I enter and see the mountain lion who is easily twice my size sitting on a couch. Scott is laying down on the couch with his head in her lap. She is gently stroking the top of his canine head. I notice his blessing-suppressing headband is off and sitting on a nearby coffee table. Scott seems very content.

Laxmi’s blessing is quite useful. When used on someone, it forces them into a state of mental clarity. Allowing people to focus and think clearly for however long she can make it last. It can even temporarily suppress mental illnesses. Briefly curing someone of ailments like depression, bipolar syndrome, and schizophrenia. Unfortunately she can’t make it last much longer than an hour or two.

Scott has insomnia and…. Something else that I honestly never asked him about, nor has he elaborated on aside from the fact that it makes his blessing hard to control. That combination causes his blessing that can create terrifying hallucinations to activate at random.

Due to this, he wears a suppression headband. An ordinary cloth headband with a medallion affixed to the front that has the ability to suppress the blessing of whoever wears it. The medallion can’t shut off a person’s blessing. Only weaken it to the point where it becomes nearly useless. But right now he has it off.

Laxmi is clearly using her blessing on him. I know she can’t use it on more than one person at a time. That rules out her helping me with this. I won’t deprive Scott of this.

“Heya Toby. What’s up?” Laxmi says in her usual cheerful tone.  
“I was just looking for someone to hang out with. But I can see you two are busy.” I said, putting on a fake smile.  
“Yup! Scott was spending all day trying to rein in his blessing.” She said.  
“How is that going anyway?” I said.  
“I’ve gotten it to the point where I can at least stop it from activating if I’m actively trying not to. But if I get distracted or lose focus it can slip out again.” Scott said with his eyes still closed.  
“Better than when you first got here at least.” I said.  
“Oh way better.” he said.  
“Well if you’re looking for someone to hang out with. I'm sorry to say we’re busy and Passeri hasn’t finished class yet.” Laxmi said.  
“Alright. See you whenever.” I said as I left the room.

Well shit. Looks like I can’t rely on someone else to help me out of this. Maybe a workout will help. Training my blessing always helps me focus anyway. I head for the elevator to go to the training room.


	2. Temporary Fulfillment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby goes to work on his blessing but quickly gets some exciting news.

Since one of the main purposes of Satvius Academy is to hone your blessing, the academy has a rather large amount of options for people to train. The trick is knowing what constitutes as training for your specific blessing. Some blessings like Arno’s don’t even need training and simply evolve overtime. While other blessings like Marwha’s can be improved through certain means.

Marwha was telling me about her training the other day. Her blessing lets her create video-game style text windows that give all sorts of information about a specific object. She found out what the window can say depends on what she herself knows. So if she wants to be able to carbon-date anything she touches, she simply needs to be familiar with the exact steps of the process. And her blessing will be able to do it even if she forgets how it works. Since she wants to be a diagnostician, she has been spending time reading through medical textbooks to learn the symptoms and treatments for whatever she can find.

For me, I don’t want my blessing to become stronger. Instead I want finer control over it. Like being able to shift gravity to flow in a curve instead of just a straight line. Or maybe being able to overlap gravity fields. I’m making some progress, I have been here for more than two and a half years after all. When I arrived here, I could only create fields of gravity that began at the ground and stretched upward. Now I can make them into various shapes anywhere in range I want. Though making them inside solid objects is a bit tough.

The training area is its own separate building, it’s connected to the sparring arena and the staff-only parts of the school. The rooms in there are incredibly varied since this school has a ton of students all with different blessings. The academy even has the students on a rotation of sorts in regard to who can go there. Each class gets it for a few days and they have to wait their turn again before they can go back. Thankfully this is the time the third-year class can use it.

I enter a large room filled with various strange equipment and people using them. While blessings are incredibly varied, they often have a lot of overlap with other blessings in how they are trained. I look around and thankfully the thing I use to train is vacant. I take off my coat since all these people training tends to make the room hot.

The station I use to train my blessing is odd looking. It is surrounded by a circular wall about knee-high and on the ground inside the wall is about one hundred dominoes all standing up. On the bottom of each one is a wire running into the floor. When they fall over, I flip a switch on the wall and the wire tugs on them to set them back up again. I grab a tennis ball from a basket on the side of the wall. This device is mainly used to train people who have something along the lines of telepathy. Navigating the balls through the spaces between the dominoes without toppling them over. I place the ball at the inside edge of the wall.

I create a small inch-long gravitational force pushing the ball forward. Then I quickly shut off that field and create another one to push the ball out of the way of a domino it’s rolling towards. But that one was a bit too strong so I make a weaker force in the opposite direction to slow it down. My goal is to get it to the other side. I’ve never made it before, at the pace I'm going it could take all day to finish it.

“Hey Flanding!” a voice yells at me over the sound of everyone else in the gym, causing me to push the ball a little too hard and knock over the dominoes.

I turn around to see Nicolo standing behind me. The large bald eagle is wearing gym clothes, so he must be training too. We have an odd dynamic between us. I’m undefeated in sparring matches and Nicolo is second place. He hates being second place but he can’t spar with me. Mostly because I refuse to since with my winning streak I’m allowed to have some sort of say in who I fight. And because I know it ticks him off, I do it to spite him for harassing Marwha.

But there is also the issue of our blessings. Nicolo can bring any physical aspect of his body to its peak physical condition. Bone hardness, strength, senses, and all that stuff. While he’s certainly formidable, there is literally nothing he can do against my blessing. I’d just send him careening off the ring without moving a muscle. Unless he spontaneously develops some kind of nonphysical attack, he really doesn’t stand a chance against me. But he won’t accept it, I’ve tried to convince him. But he’s certain he can think of a way to beat me. I fought him once every year I’ve been here and he has yet to even touch me in a match.

“Yes that’s my last name.” I said as I look at him annoyed.  
“I want to take you on again! I’ve been spending a lot of time here just for a rematch!” He said, apparently not caring that half the gym can hear him.  
“Wait. The hell do you need to train for anyway? Doesn’t your blessing put you in peak physical condition? How can you possibly train that?” I said, genuinely confused as to why he is here.  
“Well if you must know, shifting my peak-ness around can take a toll on my stamina. The closer I am to that peak beforehand, the less tired my blessing makes me.” Nicolo said.  
“Didn’t you come here to help your fiancé train early in the year and proudly claimed there is no need for training at all with your blessing? Did it really take you two and a half years to figure that out?” I said, trying to hide a smirk.  
“That doesn’t fucking matter! You’re going to spar with me next chance I get!” he said.  
“Yeah, no. I’ve got more important stuff to do.” I said when I really don’t.  
“Dammit! Stop jerking me around like this! If I fought you enough times I'm sure I can….” Nicolo said before stopping and looking behind me.

I turn around and see one of the deacons of all people. Why are they here? They point to me, I point at myself to confirm, they nod. I grab my jacket and follow them out into a hallway.

All the deacons wear red robes that conceal most of their face. I see the lower half of a scaly face and a forked tongue flicks into the air for a second, this one is definitely a snake of some kind. I heard the replacement for the one that got arrested two years ago was a snake. But I hadn’t really met them until now.

“Is something wrong?” I ask.  
“No. Nothing at all on your end. Have you by chance met a student in your class by the name of Placido Trinkis?” she said in a kind feminine voice.  
“I know that name, that’s it.” I said.  
“Well, Placido’s partner has been proven to be unfit for him. So we have had to separate them.” She said.  
“Okay. So why are you talking to me?” I said.  
“Plenty of the rooms in your dorm building are being worked on. We’ve had complaints about various issues like leaks, faulty outlets, carpeting that needs replacing, and other things for a while now. We can finally address those issues and we have moved everyone affected into temporary dorms.” She said.  
“So that’s what all those power drills I keep hearing are from! Thought I was getting tinnitus or something.” I said.  
“Well as you can imagine, we are short on spare dorms for the time being. So with your permission, we would like to have Placido stay in your dorm until we can find a new partner and free up a space for him to stay in.” she said.  
“So I’ll be getting a roommate?” I said, trying to hide my surprise.  
“Just a temporary one. The same rules regarding you and other students still apply.” She said.  
“Well that’s better than nothing. He’s welcome to stay!” I said with a smile.  
“Good. I’ll let him know. He should be moving in tonight so I recommend you tidy up the place.” She said before walking away.

Once she leaves the hall, I realize I suddenly feel much happier. It’s not what I want, but it’s better than what I’ve had for the past two and a half years. Nicolo walks through the door and demands to know what happened. I look at him with a grin and flip him off before walking away.

I need to get to cleaning up my dorm. I text Marwha as I walk, explaining to her what has just happened. She’s happy for me and even offers to help me clean!

When I get back to my dorm, I see her waiting outside the door. I casually mention Nicolo is trying to get me to spar with him again. She says if we do, she wants to record me beating him. Well now I might actually have a reason to accept his challenge.

At 7 PM. I hear a knock on my door. Marwha had left me alone a half hour prior after we cleaned up my Dorm. I was basking in the satisfaction of having a clean room when I heard the knocking. I open the door and see a cheetah in a typical Satvius Academy uniform holding a duffel bag and a large suitcase on wheels. He looks at me with a tired smile.

“Hey. You must be Tobias Flanding?” Placido said.  
“Just call me Toby. Come on in.” I said.

Placido walks into the dorm and drops his things onto the middle of the floor. He immediately collapses onto the couch and lets out a deep sigh. I sit beside him on the couch. He looks tired.

“You have no idea how much crap I have had to deal with today.” He said while resting his head in his palms.  
“I don’t actually. What happened if you don’t mind me asking?” I said.  
“I knew her for two years. She seemed great until this year started. Something must have changed when we were gone for the summer because she came back with a drinking problem.” He said.  
“How bad of a problem?” I said.  
“She stole money from me, barely went to class, was always either drunk or hungover, and this morning she threatened me with a knife when I tried to help her with her problem!” he said.  
“Oh shit.” I said.  
“Yeah. The school is trying to look into some kind of therapy for her. But I don’t think I could ever go back to her. Or at least anytime soon.” He said.  
“Well. We’re going to be stuck together for a while. I’m here to help. Speaking of which, do you need help unpacking?” I said as I look at his luggage.  
“I’ve had one hell of a day. I’ll get to that tomorrow. Right now I need a shower and eat some comfort food in my pajamas.” Placido said.  
“I got a tub of ice cream in the fridge.” I said.  
“What kind?” he said.  
“The kind with the fudge swirled in and with the tiny peanut butter things in it.” I said.  
“And already you’re leagues above her.” He said before standing up.

We spent the evening getting to know each other. Talking about our studies, our hometowns, and our friends. I eventually mention Marwha and tell him of our history together. He asks why we never dated since we both are so close.

I tell him we considered it once. But we’re too different in places that matter too much for a healthy long-term relationship. We mutually agreed that we work best as friends. Besides, I wouldn’t enjoy being part of Marwha’s family. They’re good people, but they’re a bit strange.

But soon the conversation drifts back to idle chit-chat. I finally have someone to break apart the solitude of this dorm. I don’t care if it’s temporary. I’m finally having the academy experience I have been wanting since I got accepted.


	3. The Festival Of Masks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby and Placido celebrate a holiday to honor the dead by pretending to be them and partying all night.

It’s been a month since Placido arrived. I have never felt happier at the academy. He certainly is enjoying this as well. But almost anything is better than having to live with a violent alcoholic roommate. 

Our relationship may be purely platonic. But we’ve certainly benefitted from being together. Marwha and Arno like him too. They even felt confident enough in him to tell him their whole act of hating each other is all pretend. Placido claims after the experience with his ex-fiancé, he understands why they want to do that.

Oddly enough, he isn’t threatened by my blessing. He knows full well I could easily kill him with it. But he seems to believe that I’m not the kind of person who would. And he’s right. I won’t even use it to squish bugs. 

His blessing thankfully isn’t threatening. It’s an odd one though. But Marwha and Arno have odd blessings too. So he feels good around them.

We’re all actually going to a party that the town is throwing. Today is a holiday, one of our favorites too. The Festival of Dead Masks. An event that happens one night every five years. 

We’re all in Marwha’s dorm getting ready. Marwha is wearing a plastic white mask that covers her upper face and the top of her snout. She is currently helping me secure the straps on my mask, which is similar in design but made to fit my head. Placido is using their bathroom at the moment. Standing by the beds is Arno, who is holding his mask and looking at it strangely. I noticed he has been rather quiet during our discussions on the event. Now I think I realize the problem.

“You okay Arno?” I ask.  
“Alright. I’ve been trying to understand this whole thing since I first heard of it. But they don’t do this where I’m from. What’s with these masks?” Arno said.  
“Sophist Diogen worshippers don’t do this?” Marwha said.  
“Well I’m not even sure what this is! It all seems like more than just a big party the town is throwing.” He said.  
“You know the giant conflict the gods initially had when they were awoken? The one that messed up the old world so bad they had to make a new one and have everyone abandon it.” Marwha said.  
“Yeah, I know.” He said.  
“Well these masks are made to symbolize the innocent people caught in the crossfire. We put on these masks to essentially assume their identity for a night. Then we party and enjoy ourselves while emulating these dead souls. Letting them experience the joys of life they were denied.” Marwha said.  
“Wow. That’s pretty cool. So these are supposed to be real people?” Arno said while looking at his mask.  
“Look at the tag on the strap. It should say something about whoever you’re supposed to be for tonight.” Marwha said, Arno squinted and read the tag.  
“Cornelius Abahur. Risked his life to deliver seeds to needy farmers. Died from a swarm of Ban’gor.” Arno said.  
“Yeah. Just put the mask on and do whatever some second century farmer would do when told to enjoy themselves.” Marwha said.  
“Who did you all get?” Arno asked.  
“I got Lanz Gridding. A stonemason who died in a flood.” Marwha said.  
“I got Jasille Krantwher. A milkmaid who was murdered by a member of another religion.” I said.

Arno puts on his mask as Placido comes out of the bathroom. None of us are wearing our academy uniforms for this event. There’s going to be a lot of people around and it will get a bit wild as it does every year. Don’t want to mess up our uniforms during all of this. I’m wearing a grey t-shirt and pants, figured the color would be best at hiding any stains from food and drink tonight.

Arno’s friend Kassadia walks into the room. She’s wearing her mask as well. Waiting outside is her partner Connor. Kassadia is a nice girl, though I really don’t know her that well. But Connor is madly in love with her so that says something.

“Hey! You guys ready to have a wild night!?” Kassadia said, overflowing with enthusiasm.   
“Hell yeah we are. Everyone ready?” Marwha said.

We all voice that we’re all set to go. So the six of us head out to the party. It takes place in town square. A large park in the very center of town. Though it very likely is also happening in other places. 

We walk down the street, we can already hear the commotion from the party. The sun is just beginning to set and the streetlights flicker to life. We turn a corner and see the festival in full swing.

Tons of people are here and all wearing masks too. Dozens of people have set up booths and kiosks to give out food and drink. All of it free too, no-one is allowed to directly profit off of the festival. I don’t know why, but that rule came from very high up on the religious chain of command. So everyone tends to follow it. I think the town gives people money to supply the food beforehand though. 

All around us are people conversing with each other, drinking bottles of who knows what, and eating whatever they want. One corner of the square has a bunch of games set up for people to play. There are speakers blasting upbeat music all over the place too. A drunk schnauzer stumbles past me and sits down on a curb before taking a long swig at their drink. Tonight is a night you’ll probably regret in the morning. But you’re not doing this for yourself, this is for whoever your mask is for. 

Marwha is the only one of us that doesn’t drink. So she’s going to make sure we don’t get too crazy. I’ll admit, we went to one of these festivals back home and I was a bit too wild. But that was before I was able to drink so who knows how this will happen.

We all immediately went to a food truck serving liquor and greasy food. We didn’t have dinner since we know there is going to be plenty of free food here. I’m an experienced drinker, so I know my limits. But tonight isn’t a night for limits.

Our evening consisted of this for the most part. Us going from place to place eating and drinking. Progressively getting drunker each time. Soaking in all the enthusiasm and raw energy from the crowd. I’m going to feel awful in the morning. Thankfully it’s Saturday and I won’t have any classes to go to tomorrow.

Around what I can only assume is 9 PM. I see Nicolo approach me. He’s easily as drunk as I am. He’s accompanied by his partner Lalia, an imposing black bear. She seems more sober than him. Nicolo clumsily walks over to me gripping a cup in his talons while an unaware Marwha tries to stop Kassadia from getting into a fight with another inebriated student.

“Hey…. Yer friends are here too?” Nicolo says, his mask stained with grease and drink stains.  
“Yeah. Why you askin?” I said as I try to focus on him.  
“I still need to get er back for beatin me with a candle thingy” he said.  
“Well yer not allowed to fight er anymore. Deacons said so!” I said.  
“And am fuckin pissed bout it! But wha bout you? I could beat your fuzzy brown ass here and now!” Nicolo said.  
“Woah there Nic. Reign it in. We can’t start shit tonight.” Lalia said as she grabbed Nicolo’s shoulders with her large hands and pulled him back.  
“Yeah yer right. Don’t want to make Jediah or whoever the fuck his name is upset. He leant me his identity for the night so I could get fucked up guilt free. He’s such a cool guy. Just like you Lal….” Nicolo said as he lazily put an arm around Lalia’s waist.  
“Let’s find you a bench to sit on.” Lalia said.  
“But Tobby! Lemme know if you wanna spar! I know I’ll win!” Nicolo said as Lalia led him away.  
“No way ya feathery bastard!” I said.

I watch Nicolo and Lalia disappear into the crowd. The noise is starting to get to me. Also I think I drank too much. My vision is starting to blur and I'm having a hard time understanding what’s going on. I tell Marwha I’m going to find someplace quiet to rest. 

I stumble away from the crowd and out of the square. I sit against the wall of some building while on the sidewalk of an empty street. I lean against the wall and close my eyes, the commotion just quiet enough to give me a bit of peace for ten minutes. I think I’ll ask Marwha to bring me back now. I just need to manage to stand up.

I struggle to get to my feet, already regretting the hangover I’m going to have. I hear someone walk down the sidewalk. I look at them, but I’m too drunk to make out much detail. I tell them I’m sorry for being in their way and that I just drank too much. 

But then they grab my shoulders and pin me against the wall. I feel something jab into my neck, or possibly more than one, my drunk state making it hard to distinguish the pain. But it feels like a needle. My vision grows more blurry and soon it all goes black.

But then I have blurry visions of walking with my friends. Drinking more liquor, eating more food, and generally celebrating. The remainder of the night just seems like a blur to me. I vaguely remember getting home and collapsing onto the bed before falling right to sleep.

I dream of a memory from my life. I’m thirteen, my blessing had just surfaced and I crushed a trashcan with it accidentally. I had spent half the day with my father as I had to register my blessing as a potential weapon. It’s a lengthy process, but I could face serious consequences for not doing it. 

I’m sitting in my room, trying to use my blessing to move some wads of paper resting on the carpet. I accidentally use too much force and send one shooting upwards into the ceiling. Thankfully it’s still paper and it just bounces off.

My dad walks in. He’s a quokka like me. He had just finished cleaning up the remains of the trashcan I had flattened. He sees me experimenting with my blessing and smiles before sitting down next to me on my bed.

“Well. Looks like you’re trying to figure it out.” He said.  
“I'm afraid if I don’t learn how to use it soon, I could hurt people.” I said.  
“I know you would never hurt anyone if you didn’t mean it. But training it certainly wouldn’t be a bad idea.” He said.  
“Sorry about the can.” I said.  
“It was old anyway. Just be glad it was a can and not something more important.” He said.  
“Yeah…. Marwha got her blessing not long ago too. I was looking forward to showing her mine, but now I'm not so sure.” I said.  
“Don’t you worry about that. She’s your best friend, these situations are exactly what they are for.” he says as he softly embraces me.

My worries almost seemed to melt away. I hug him back. I know he’s right. I decide to head straight over to Marwha as soon as I can.

“Oh wow! That’s a pretty cool blessing!” Marwha says as I make a shoe hover off the ground.  
“You really think so?” I say.  
“You can control gravity! You’re manipulating one of the fundamental forces of the universe! Something like this is only possible in science fiction!” she says with a look of wonder on her face.  
“I didn’t think of it like that.” I said as I make the shoe drop to the floor, but I also notice a strange black stain on the bottom of it.  
“My blessing isn’t nearly as cool as yours. All it does is tell me things about stuff I touch.” Marwha said.  
“What kind of things though?” I said.  
“Stuff like what it’s made of and how old it is. I’m not really sure what I can even do with it. Achal and Lauma have better blessings than me.” Marwha said.  
“Hey, I’m sure your blessing has a cool ability. You just have to figure out how to use it best.” I said.  
“You think so?” Marwha said, she is shedding a single black tear.  
“I do! Everyone’s blessing works differently. Sure it won’t help you in a fight, but all that means is that you shouldn’t fight people.” I said, there are multiple black stains on the walls now.  
“Toby. You’re the best friend I could ask for.” She wipes a tear out of her eyes which are completely black and seeping a black substance when she pulls her hand away. “You’ll help me with my blessing. And I’ll help you with yours. Deal?”  
“Deal.” I said with a smile as I shake her hand, my fingers puncture her skin to reveal her hand is just a hollow shell filled with this black substance.  
“Someday we’ll get out of this place. We’ll meet people and show them our blessings.” She said, her mouth drooling with the black liquid.  
“I look forward to it.” I said as my mouth starts filling up with a thick substance that tastes like sour blood.


	4. The Scheme

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby feels strange after the festival.

I groggily open my eyes. I don’t remember much of last night after getting away from the party for a short time. Did I drink too much? This is my 18th birthday all over again. I think dad told me that mom could drink like that too. I really shouldn’t be getting that wild. But it was the Festival of Masks for gods’ sake! I’m practically obligated to go nuts.

My shirt from last night is still on, as is my underwear. Everything else is on the floor. I’m expecting to start feeling a nasty hangover any second now. But I don’t think it’s happening. Either I drank so much I’m still drunk, or I somehow avoided one entirely. I did eat a lot of meat and drank a decent amount of water. But I was having alcohol for most of the night. I should be feeling something.

Ah screw it. I won’t complain about missing a hangover. I reach down on the ground and pluck my phone from my pants pocket. It’s 11 AM, I remember it’s the weekend and breathe a sigh of relief that I don’t need to go anywhere today. I think it’s an unspoken rule that anyone who attends the festival is to be given at least a day to recover. I have a text from Marwha that was sent a half hour ago asking if I’m awake yet. I message her to let her know I'm awake.

I notice something in the corner of the room. Sitting on the couch is Placido with a pair of headphones over his ears playing a game on the TV. He’s focusing on his game, he hasn’t noticed I'm awake yet. At least he was considerate not to wake me. I sit up and stare at my bed for a minute before finally getting out of bed.

I grab a pair of sweatpants as well as a new shirt. I look around in my drawer for a new pair of underwear, but I can’t find one. All the pairs I have are dirty. Damn, at least Placido can help me with this. I walk into view and he pauses his game.

“Hey! You’re finally awake. You passed out right away when we got back. You gonna take a shower?” he said.  
“I was going to. But I don’t have any clean underwear. I was hoping you could help me with that.” I said.  
“No problem. Gimme a minute.” Placido said.

Placido’s blessing is unusual, but also incredibly convenient. He holds out two fingers and touches them together. He slowly separates them and a pair of underwear begins to form between them. Placido can generate textiles from nothing. It’s slow, but he can make nearly any kind of clothing you need as long as it’s not made of something like leather. It does have some kind of cost, as he can only generate a certain amount each day. I think he said something like ten square feet’s worth of material. Though he did claim that number has increased since he got here. And he has been able to add things to the clothing like embroidery and elastic.

Placido holds out a new pair of underwear for me. I take it from his hands, it’s warm for some reason. I thank him and head into the bathroom. One shower later, I’m cleaned up and in fresh clothes. Marwha enters the dorm just as I get out. She looks puzzled for some reason.

“You feeling okay? You don’t look horribly hung over.” Marwha said.  
“I feel fine. Just a bit drowsy.” I said.  
“Consider yourself lucky. Arno’s so hung over he refuses to get out of bed. How are you feeling Placido?” Marwha said.  
“I’m okay. But if I lay down right now I'm not getting back up today.” He said.  
“Yeah. How the hell are you okay?” Marwha said.  
“I dunno. I don’t feel drunk so it definitely would have hit me by now.” I said.

Marwha gently pokes me in the chest. No doubt to activate her blessing. I see her eyes scanning the air beside me, reading the text only she can perceive. I hear she was working on making her windows visible to other people. She seems to finish and looks at me again.

“Well my blessing isn’t picking up anything odd. Must have managed to avoid one. You did get a bit wild, especially later on.” She said.  
“I can only remember up to that point where I ducked away to get some quiet. What happened after that?” I asked.  
“Well I was trying to keep track of all of you. But it was more of the same of what you did before. Though at one point I saw you talking to Nicolo. You accepted his request to spar with him. The match is in fifteen minutes.” She said.  
“Oh gods did I really do that?” I said.  
“Yeah. Check your phone, the school should have sent you a text.” She said.

I grab my phone and look. Sure enough, I have a match today at 12 PM. Why the hell is he scheduling it so early? He challenged me, he could have booked it for any time and I doubt many people are sparring the day after the festival. Dammit, now I gotta go do this. 

I don’t have long before it starts so I need to get going. If I accept a match and I miss it, then it counts as a loss. I’m proud of my perfect sparring record and I want to keep it. Also I refuse to let Nicolo get any kind of win against me. I know he wouldn’t accept that as a victory, but it’s a matter of principle.

I put on some shoes and grab my sparring clothes. I notice a paper bag on the counter by the door. Placido says it’s a bag of doughnuts from the festival. Me and Marwha grab one and head out. 

Marwha has no reason to go with me. But we had been talking for the past few days when Nicolo was pestering me to fight him. If I ever agree to fight Nicolo again, Marwha wants to record the fight. I don’t know what she plans to do with the footage. But whatever she does, Nicolo has it coming.

Now I don’t spar as much as Nicolo, but I also don’t ever lose. Nicolo has lost matches before, usually because his opponent has some odd blessing he can’t immediately figure out. But he is persistent and eventually learned how to beat everyone he has lost to. Everyone except for me. 

I make it to the locker room for the sparring arena, Marwha heads for one of the viewing booths. I change into the sparring uniform. It’s really nothing more than a dull red pair of shorts and a tank top that only covers you down to your chest. I was never really a fan of this outfit. But I don’t ever wear it for long.

I finish changing just in time for me to get to the sparring room. Five circular arenas atop stone pillars extending out of a pool of water with bridges going from the tops to the walls. Between the bridges are booths on the walls for people to watch the matches. I can see Marwha hiding in one of them with her phone just barely poking over the top. 

Standing in the center of one arena is Nicolo. But something seems off. He looks perfectly fine. The Nicolo I encountered before my blackout was as drunk as I was! Shouldn’t he be hung over? Unless that was part of his plan. Pretend to be drunk and get me to accept to fight him the day after the festival. I would have been horribly hung over and he would have been fine. 

He planned to take advantage of it. Would winning against someone with a handicap like that be a victory in his eyes? Or has he grown so desperate to defeat me that he resorts to tactics like this? Well it doesn’t matter if it would have worked or not. I feel fine, but I don’t need to let him know that.

“Ugh. Dammit you feathery bastard. Why did you have to schedule it so early?” I said while clutching my head and pretending I have a headache.  
“You agreed to it, you have no right to complain.” He said with a snide smile.  
“Hold on, can I just sit down for a second?” I said as I step over to the opposite end of the arena and sit down.  
“You giving up?” he said.  
“Can you keep it down? Gods my head is killing me.” I said.

Standing in a special viewing booth of their own, The sparring instructor appears, also seeming visibly hungover. I can see why the festival is always before a weekend. He sits down and looks at the only occupied arena in the whole room.

“Alright let’s get this over with so I can go back to bed. You both ready?” he said.  
“Lets fucking go!” Nicolo said as he uses his blessing to make himself very muscular.  
“Sure…. I guess?” I said, feigning confusion.

The instructor gives the signal to start. Nicolo rushes straight at me, thinking I’m an easy win. But he can’t see that I’ve created a gravity stream going in an arc over my head. He steps into it, he is immediately picked up off the ground and sent flying over my head. He falls down into the pool with a splash. I hear him surface and shout various curses. I quickly stand up and walk back across the bridge.

Marwha meets me in the hall. She has a wide grin and is holding her phone tightly. It will take a bit before Nicolo manages to get up here to confront me about what happened. But Marwha and I agreed that it would be best if he believes he can’t beat me even in a horribly hungover state. I don’t even change, I just put my clothes on over my sparring uniform before we sprint back to my dorm.

We make it back to my dorm in no time. We’re both panting from the run, but it’s worth it. Marwha pulls out her phone again and plays the video of the fight for me. I ask her what she plans to do with it. She says she has some ideas, but she wants it to be a surprise. 

Placido is still on the couch. He pauses his game and asks what happened. We explain what we had done to Nicolo. Placido has also lost a few matches to him, he asked for Marwha to send him the video when she can. She agrees and heads out to go show Arno. 

Glad the one thing I had to do today is over. I head into the bathroom to change out of my sparring uniform. I take off my regular clothes to get to the uniform underneath. But as I take off the shirt, I notice something unusual. There is a white patch of fur on my chest. Was that there this morning and I just didn’t notice it? If it was a stain, shouldn’t it have scrubbed off when I showered?

It’s odd, but it’s also just a spot. I probably got something spilled down my shirt last night and whatever it is won’t be washed out with shampoo. At least I can cover it easily. No one really has an opportunity to see me shirtless outside of the sparring arena’s locker room. I put my clothes back on and go to see how Placido is doing.

We sit around for an hour. Then we go get lunch once we get hungry. We decide to sit on a bench outside and eat since it’s a nice day out. But as we’re doing that, I feel strange.

My mind is focusing on that trick Nicolo tried to pull on me. The asshole actually tried to do that! He tried to ruin my perfect record using such an underhanded tactic. I thought that maybe he had enough respect for the rules of the sparring arena that he wouldn’t try something like that. But that feathered son of a whore actually tried that! 

I felt a little bad at first for tricking him with that act. But now I don’t. That shitheel has been harassing Marwha and Arno for years! All because he thinks their arguing is indirectly making him look bad. Is that all he cares about? His reputation!? He fucking told people it was Marwha who got targeted by that cult when they tried to keep it confidential. Oh I wish I was there to see Marwha beat the crap out of that guy. He deserved every bruise he got from that. Actually, he deserves more! Him and that furry mountain of a fiancé he has! 

“Toby. You okay?” Placido said.  
“Huh? Yeah…. I'm fine.” I said, snapping out of whatever train of thought I was having.  
“You looked really angry. Did something happen?” he asked.  
“No. I…. I’m just thinking about something complicated.” I said.  
“Okay…. Well I'm going to head back to the dorm. You coming?” he asked.  
“No. I think I’ll walk around for a bit.” I said.

Gods he’s right though. I do feel angry. I almost want to find Nicolo just so I can punch him. Punching something sounds good right now. Maybe I should head down to the gym. Today is the last day in our turn to use it on the rotation anyway. 

I walk into the gym and see a vacant punching bag. That will work just fine. I stand in front of it and begin hitting it with all I have. Blow after blow, venting this burning rage inside of me. I know Marwha bottles up most of her aggression, is this what it feels like when it gets too much?

As I keep throwing punches, I find myself getting annoyed. Not at the bag or my attacks. But the other people in the gym. All making obnoxious sounds.

Elias over by the water fountain loudly slurping. Gina on the treadmill stepping just a bit too loud for my tastes. Frances on the bag next to mine listening to some awful music just loud enough for me to hear through her earbuds. Two guys on the other side of the room loudly lifting weights, making noises as they lift and loudly counting how many they have done. Julie sitting on a bench talking over the phone. Yuri loudly adjusting the weights on one of the machines. GODS IT’S ALL SO FUCKING ANNOYING!!!!

I quickly walk out the back door just so I can hear myself think. Now I think I'm angrier than when I started. I look out and see the edge of campus. A fence surrounds the border and beyond that is a small forest, the only gap is the canal running in from the forest and through the back of the school. The same canal Marwha nearly drowned in. 

I walk up to a specific tree near the edge of the canal. This is where that whole shit with the cult started. Wish I was there to help her. I was too busy holding Achal back and explaining why what he was doing would end up killing his sister. If I were there with Marwha as she ran through town trying to stay alive, I would have easily crushed some of those cult bastards. Even back then I could kill someone easily with my blessing. Just crush people to death with the weight of a car, it’s what they deserved and I should have been there to do it!

Wait- what the hell am I thinking? I don’t want to kill anyone. Yeah they were evil, but I don’t think I could have lived with myself if I ended someone’s life with my blessing. Why was I so angry just now?

I’m not feeling like myself. Maybe all that liquor did affect me. I should go back to my dorm and lie down. Yeah, that’s what I should do….

I take one last look at the forest. Then I see it. A pale-pink figure standing beyond the fence. Staring at me with empty eye sockets, devoid of any features that I could make out as any specific species. Like it’s the bare minimum to have a silhouette that resembles a person. What a loathsome figure it is.

Oh how I hate it. This thing is what I need. A receptacle to receive my hatred. I sprint towards the fence. I don’t care how I do it. This thing needs to die.


	5. Mistakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby does something he shouldn't have done.

I open my eyes. I’m in my bed. I quickly sit up and look outside the window to my side. Is it morning? It was 2 PM just now! I grab my phone and see that it is indeed the next day. What the hell happened? 

I remember being out near the canals. I was really angry too, but I feel much calmer now. I saw…. Something, I can’t remember what though. Then it all just went black. 

I remember bits of what happened, but barely anything coherent. Maybe I really was just still drunk from the festival and the hangover hit me really hard? Is that a thing that can happen? I don’t know, now isn’t the time to think about it. I have class in a half hour. 

I take off my pajamas in the middle of my dorm. Placido seems to already be gone, he has a class earlier than me. I take off my shirt to put on a clean shirt for my uniform. But as I look down to get one out of a drawer, I notice the spot is still there.

That same white patch of fur on my chest. Did it get bigger? I didn’t measure it last time so it’s hard to tell. It’s about the size of my palm right now. Do I have to shave this thing off? I don’t have any clippers on hand for that. I’ll have to ask around, I think there is a sheep in my history class. They probably have one I can borrow.

I go about my day. Attending my classes and feeling generally okay. But occasionally, I would overhear parts of conversations. Students talking about some strange thing that happened out near the canals. I can never hear the whole story. But I know the police are involved.

As I walk to another class, I get a text from Marwha. She’s just asking how I’m feeling. But what surprises me is the messages before that. An entire conversation I don’t remember having. This happened around 5PM yesterday. I don’t remember much about that time. I scroll up until I find the start of the conversation.

\- Hey Toby, Placido told me you were upset at something. You want to talk about it?  
\- No thanks. Just thinking about some heavy stuff. I’ll feel better.  
\- You sure? Have you been taking those antidepressants like you’re supposed to?  
\- I have. I just need to be alone for a bit.  
\- Maybe you should go see Laxmi.   
\- I’m fine. If I need help. You will be the first person I text. Just please show up as quick as you can if I ask.  
\- I will.

I’ll admit that’s nice of Marwha to show concern and offer to help me like that. But why don’t I remember having this conversation? How did I lose half a day’s worth of memories? Is it just me, or is this happening to other people? 

But my train of thought is stopped when I make eye contact with two police officers outside of my classroom. They ask if I’m Toby Flanding, which I confirm. They ask me to follow them out to the back of the school. I have a feeling that this can’t be good.

They lead me out back near the canal. By the fence I can see several cars parked near a section that has been destroyed. But the weird part is that in the destroyed section is a bunch of floating debris, as if they were turned weightless. Forensics officers and even one of the deacons are around the strange phenomena. 

“Did you have anything to do with this?” one of the officers asked me.  
“No. Why do you think I did?” I said.  
“You’re the only student in this whole school with a blessing to let them manipulate gravity. Gravity for those rocks doesn’t work anymore. You’re our only suspect.” The officer said.  
“That’s true. But my blessing doesn’t work like that! I can’t make things weightless. Even if I could, the effect stops as soon as I move out of range.” I said.  
“He’s not lying. I analyzed his blessing. It shouldn’t be capable of something like this.” One of the forensics officers said.  
“Well who else could it be? He’s the only one here who can do this sort of thing.” An officer said.  
“Could be the work of a monster left over by the gods. Some of them have gravity controlling powers.” The deacon said.  
“Then we would have to get the K.o.P. involved.” An officer said.  
“If we can determine any evidence of monster presence, call them over.” the forensics officer said.  
“So can I go now?” I asked.  
“Yeah sure go ahea-” the officer began to say before being interrupted.  
“Dear gods! What happened here!?” one of the forensics officers said.  
“Huh? What is it?” the officer said as they ran over.

I look over, on the opposite side of the fence is a dried red stain on the grass. And in the center of it is a severed hand crushed flat. But the hand was deformed. It’s hairless and had digits that can only be vaguely compared to fingers. Though that may be due to the fact it was flattened.

“Did this just turn into a murder case?” someone said.  
“I think it did. I’ll alert the rest of the forensics team.” Someone else said.

The deacon peeks at the scene. Then they look away and seem to shiver. I guess they don’t do well with blood. They walk over to me, I see a beak poking out from the hood. They look at me while fiddling with their talon-tipped hands.

“You should probably get back to class. This is no place for a student.” They said.  
“Don’t have to tell me twice.” I said as I quickly make my way back to the school.

I start to walk back to class. But the whole thing is making me feel uneasy. I really don’t want to go back to class. Today is just a review day and it’s my last class for the day. Screw it, I’m heading somewhere else.

I walk off campus and into town, taking random turns, not caring where I go. All the while I’m just spacing out. I don’t know how long I wander for. But eventually, I find myself at the boardwalk. I can smell food from Sal’s, I have a craving for something meaty. 

I walk inside, it’s crowded as usual. I order a small basket of fried food to go. I take my snack down to the beach and sit down in the sand. I idly munch away at it, my thoughts nothing more than a jumbled mess of confusion. I barely remember how I even got here.

“Toby?” Marwha said. I turn around to see her at the entrance of the beach looking at me.  
“Hey.” I said.  
“I saw those police guys lead you away from class. You didn’t come back, I was worried about you.” She said as she walks over to me.  
“It was nothing. No need to worry.” I said.  
“I mean…. That’s good. But you don’t look okay.” She said.  
“Just thinking of all the shit I need to go through at this school.” I said.  
“You want to talk about it?” she asks.  
“No.” I said.  
“You sure? You know I’ll understand.” She said.  
“NO, because you know what Marwha? You don’t understand. All I want in life is to have someone I can be close to. Someone I can confess whatever I have in my mind and they would understand because they love me as much as I would love them. I had hoped that fantasy would finally come true when we came here. BUT NO! You get hitched up with someone you’re pretending not to love and I’m stuck stewing in my dorm by myself! It’s just like back in Ingle, only now half the town won’t be dead by year’s end.” I said as I stood up and looked her in the eye as I said it.  
“Toby wha-” Marwha began to say, looking shocked.  
“And don’t you pull that crap about how you’re who I can rely on! We both know the only reason we were friends is because we were our only options! Maybe you’re the reason I couldn’t find anyone! Who would want to befriend the guy that’s best friends with the girl who’s prone to violent outbursts? Maybe that’s it! Maybe you’re the reason I felt so miserable the entire time I was here!” I shouted at her.

Marwha is speechless. She looks like I just shot her favorite pet in front of her. She just turns around and starts running away. I glare at her as she turns a corner and moves out of view. She looked hurt. Good, she deserves it for how much trouble she has caused me my whole life.

I sit back down to finish my snack, staring out at the waves, feeling proud of myself that I finally confronted her about that. Now she knows the only thing I got out of our friendship is loneliness…. Wait. WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST DO!?

Oh gods! Those things I said to her! What made me think it that was okay!? I’ve never once considered her a burden, why did I say those things? I felt ready to even fight her if she tried anything. I would never fight Marwha! I have to find her quick!

I get up and start running in the direction I saw Marwha go. I imagine she’s heading back to the academy, but I should catch up to her as soon as I could. She’s my best friend! I can’t lose her. I won’t let my home be more isolated than it already is!

I run over to where I saw her turn. She took a shortcut through an alleyway we normally cut through. I start running through it as fast as I can. But then something leaps out from inside a dumpster. It takes me a second to stop and look at what it is. Then I realize what’s standing in my path.

It’s another one of those fucking things! THOSE DAMN PALE THINGS WITH NO EYES! SCREW FINDING THAT BITCH MARWHA! THIS THING NEEDS TO DIE!!!!

My body feels hot, a burning feeling from within. My clothes feel tighter now. I look down at my hands. The normally dark brown fur is now white. My normally short and dull claws are now much larger and look sharper than usual. I should be concerned about this. But this burning within my body is accompanied by a euphoric feeling I can’t describe. All the while, that thing is just staring at me with its wretched sockets.

I claw at the wretched thing, causing three deep gashes in its torso that begin gushing blood. I slash and stab at it over and over, the thing not reacting at all. This just makes me angrier! FIGHT BACK OR COWER IN FEAR!!!!

I stand back and stare at the bloodied thing. Then I create a patch of increased gravity on the floor just below its right foot. Its bones making a satisfying cracking sound as they snap and the leg bends in half. The sudden injury causes it to lean into the patch of gravity. An arm is ripped from its socket and flattened. Its head begins to collapse under its weight. Soon the thing is a mangled mess on the ground covered in blood. And I feel more proud of myself than I have ever felt before.

“Very good. I like the progress we are making.” A voice says out of my view.

I reflexively freeze up. I feel my blessing shut off. I want to move, but my body won’t let me. It’s almost as if my joints were locked up somehow.

Someone walks into view. They’re wearing a hoodie and jeans. Under the hood I see they’re wearing a ski-mask of some kind. But over that is a dust-mask and a pair of sunglasses. No identifiable features like antlers or ears are visible. I can’t even see if they have a tail or not. Their hands have fingerless gloves revealing clawed hands the same shade of white as I am right now. They lean in close to my face. I move my eyes to look at them. But then they quickly lean away.

“You’re still there? I thought you would have blacked out by now. Agh, this damn stuff. It’s like a damn computer program. Fix one thing and it ends up causing another random problem. Lucky for us, this batch should be better.” they say.

They hold up a hand. Their fingers and claws lengthen and merge into needle-like tendrils. The tips are seeping some strange black substance that is seemingly evaporating in the open air. They reach close and stick each of them into my neck, I can feel them injecting that stuff into me. My vision quickly goes black.


	6. Nosocomephobia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby is given no choice but to confront one of his worst fears of he wants to get help.

I wake up in my bed again. I sit up and look around. Was that all a dream? I look at my phone and to my dismay, it’s morning of the next day. No, that was real. I have no memory of what happened in the latter half of the day. Something is going on here.

I recount the events that I remember from the day before. I changed, my fur turned white and I grew giant claws. But one look at my arm shows I’m back to normal now. Wait…. Oh gods. I said all of those things to Marwha!

I practically leap out of bed. Placido happens to exit the bathroom at the same time. I’m in my pajamas, I should change before I talk to her. But then I look at Placido and he is looking at me strange.

“What?” I ask.  
“The hell is happening to you? First you walk out on me during lunch and I don’t see you until the next morning. Now I hear you blamed Marwha for all your social problems and vanished all night again!?” he said.  
“Placido…. Something is happening to me. Something is making me act out. Say and do things I would never do!” I said.  
“Yeah. And that’s what my ex-fiancé said when I asked her about her drinking. I’m not dealing with this again. Get yourself under control or I’m just going to move in with someone else and leave you alone again.” He said.

Placido grabs his backpack and walks out to go to class. I look at the clock, I need to get moving if I’m going to have time to talk. I rush into the bathroom with a spare set of clothes and change. But as I take my shirt off. I see something worrying.

The spot on my chest is no longer a spot. It’s a massive blotch covering nearly my entire chest. And my fears are true, it is the same shade of white as I was yesterday. This thing is growing, it has to be connected to whatever is happening to me.

I cough and feel something odd in my mouth. Something sharp that shouldn’t be there. I look in the mirror and open my mouth as wide as it can go. It’s my teeth, they’re sharp! Most of my teeth are normally flat due to my herbivore heritage. But these teeth are different! I look like I could chew someone’s arm off with these!

My body is changing. How is this possible? Body morphing blessings are universally restricted to only affecting the user. Is it that stuff that person injected me with? I place my hand over the side of my neck where I felt the injections. I don’t feel anything at all.

Marwha, her blessing can help me. She can find out if this is actually the work of a blessing or I’m just sick and hallucinating all of this. I get dressed as quickly as I can and run next door. But her dorm is locked. I knock on the door, hoping they are still inside.

The door opens ever so slightly. I see Arno on the other side glaring at me. No doubt Marwha told him what I said to her. I try to say something, but he just slams the door shut. I should have known this would happen. I get out my phone to try and text her. But instead I’m given a message that says she has my number blocked. DAMMIT! WHAT’S HER FUCKING DEAL!?!?

No! Stop that! Calm the hell down! That anger is what got me into this situation with her!

I need help, but I can’t get it from Marwha…. LAXMI! Her blessing can at least keep me sane for an hour so I can figure this out better! I rush over to her dorm.

I twist the doorknob, it’s not locked. I don’t care, I need help and I have no time for pleasantries. I open the door to see Laxmi on a couch with half of an éclair in her mouth. Scott isn’t here from the looks of it. 

“Woah, what the crap?” Laxmi says with her mouth full.   
“Laxmi. I need your help-” I begin to say.  
“Hold on!” Laxmi says as she swallows her food. “What do you need help with so badly you barge into my dorm?”  
“There’s something going on with me. It’s making me act weird. I need to be in a better headspace to fix it.” I said.  
“Is that your excuse for what you did to Marwha?” she said.  
“Yes! I’m lashing out at things. You know me! I’m not an angry person. But for the past few days I’ve just been filled with rage. I swear I will make it up to her. But first I need to stop whatever is happening from happening.” I said and Laxmi replies with a sigh.  
“Fine. I’ll help you. That doesn’t really sound like something you would normally do. So something being wrong sounds somewhat believable. Sit down.” Laxmi said as she patted the space on the couch beside her.

I quickly sit on the couch and face her. She looks me in the eyes and holds up one of her fingers. She moves a clawed finger towards the space between my eyes. She just barely touches my skin with her claw before moving her hand away. I feel it almost immediately.

It’s hard to describe the feeling of her blessing. If I had to say something…. It feels like a wave of calm washing over your mind. A mental clarity and peace one could only naturally achieve through something like drugs or meditating in a mountain for a decade. I would say it’s euphoric, but I actually can’t experience such a feeling when under its effects. I could be watching a horror movie or pornography and it wouldn’t distract me one bit. Scott is lucky to be betrothed to someone like her.

Right now, I realize just how much my mental state was changed. The subtle annoyances I have been having with everyday things are gone, I’m no longer anxious for no reason, and my memory is getting clearer. I can’t remember the times I blacked out, but the time before them is much less hazy. However, I notice another feeling is no longer there. I don’t feel like I’m being watched. A general sense of paranoia I didn’t notice I had until it was gone. I need to act fast, this will only last an hour or so.

“Thank you Laxmi. Please just try to tell Marwha I’m sorry.” I said as I stood up.  
“I will but I can’t promise she’ll listen.” She said as I walked out.

I head back to my dorm to try and formulate a plan. A quick check in the mirror confirms that the blotch is still there and my teeth are still different, this isn’t just me hallucinating. First thing I need to do is put a stop to whatever is happening. But I don’t like my options.

The school nurse won’t be much help. Her clinic isn’t equipped to deal with something like this. I need to go to the hospital in town…. Which I really don’t want to do.

I never liked hospitals. Just being in one makes me nervous to hell and back. I don’t know why. I’ve never had a bad experience in one before. Nor do I have any other negative trauma associated with hospitals. I just never felt comfortable in one. So many sick and injured in a single place with a basement full of dead bodies. It just makes my fur stand on end. 

But unfortunately, that’s my only option. Marwha was my best shot at finding out what’s wrong with me. But she won’t see me after what I did. This is the only thing I have left. Thankfully Laxmi’s blessing should hold back my anxieties until they can find out what’s wrong.

I grab my phone and walk into town. It’s not far from the school thankfully. But the entire way there, I’m looking down at the ground. Those things I’ve been seeing are what I think causes me to turn into whatever that was. They make me get engulfed in rage to the point of killing them. I don’t know what those are, but they can’t be good. If I keep staring at the floor, I hopefully won’t see one. 

I keep walking. Staring at the GPS on my phone to guide me. Only looking up to watch for cars when crossing the street. Not paying any mind to anyone I pass. I can’t risk it, if I get too angry out here in public. No, I won’t think about it….

I finally make it. I walk into the emergency room of the hospital. Thankfully there isn’t anyone else in need of help today. The alpaca at the reception desk sees me.

“Do you need help sir?” she asks.  
“Yes I do! I’m under the effects of some kind of blessing. I’m feeling periodic bursts of intense rage. There is a strange white patch of fur on my chest that is growing larger every day. I have been blacking out and missing memories of nearly entire days. And also somehow my teeth are sharp now.” I said, calmly explaining the situation.  
“Is this an emergency? You sound very calm about the whole thing?” she asked, looking genuinely confused.  
“I had a friend use her blessing on me to force me into a state of mental clarity so I could suppress my newfound rage and my horrible fear of hospitals.” I said.  
“Okay…. Well if a blessing is causing your issues. We should be able to fix it by cancelling out the blessing.” She said as she reached into a drawer in her desk.

She pulls out a medallion, one shaped exactly like the symbol on Scott’s headband. The symbol itself looks like a triangle with three taller triangles extending from each side. These medallions are made from a special process using materials held in high regard by all three religions. I never looked into the process itself. But the results are well known.

If you place the underside of the medallion onto the body of someone. It weakens their blessing and any blessings being used on them. I hear some people are trying to find a way to make them cancel out a blessing entirely. No idea how one would go about making that happen though.

She asks me to stand close to the desk. I move as close as I can and she stands up to reach over and place the medallion on my chest. Immediately I feel Laxmi’s blessing melt away. She holds it there for about 30 seconds before moving it away. 

“There. How do you feel?” she asks.  
“Worse. It removed my friend’s blessing.” I said as the realization I'm in a hospital dawns on me.  
“I mean your problems with the other blessing.” She said.

I feel my teeth with my tongue. Still sharp. I grab my shirt collar and pull it down as far as I can. The white patch is still there.

“It didn’t do anything!” I said.  
“What? That shouldn’t be possible. This should have forced some kind of change in your physical state.” She said as she looked at the medallion.   
“Well what now!?” I said, getting a bit angry that it didn’t work.  
“Calm down sir. I’ll call in someone to take a better look.” She said as she grabbed a phone and mumbled something into it.

I sit down in a chair. Trying to ignore where I am. Just looking at the floor while sitting in a chair. A chair dozens of people have sat in before me. Who knows how many of them even left this place alive. How many have died here? This is where one goes to either stay with the living or join the dead. And usually, they don’t get to make that choice.

No, that choice is made by other things. A doctor making a mistake. An unknown allergy to something meant to help you. Someone not being able to save you fast enough. You don’t have much choice in how you leave this place.

“Excuse me sir. Can you come with me?” a middle-aged otter in a white coat soon says to me.

Without saying a word. I follow him to a room with one of those weird tables that has the paper over it. He asks me to sit down and remove my shirt. I do as he says and he examines the white patch and my teeth.

He makes barely audible comments. He asks me questions like my name, family medical history, blessing, and all sorts of stuff like that. He’s unable to come to a solid conclusion as to what could be causing such odd mental and physical changes. He then says he will take some blood for testing.

I don’t have a problem with needles. But needles in a hospital from a doctor are not something I want to deal with. Nonetheless, I hold out my arm and let him use a syringe to get a sample. When he’s done, he examines the syringe but then frowns. He mutters something about the needle possibly being defective. He puts it on a counter and grabs a fresh one. He takes more blood and frowns again when he examines it. 

I ask him what’s wrong. He claims the inside of the syringes must be dirty or something since there is something floating around in the blood. He lets me look and I see a black fluid mixed in with my blood. But the fluid vanishes in seconds. He uses another fresh needle, again it’s tainted. 

Out of curiosity, he dabs the spot where I was stuck with a tissue. Once it has some blood soaked into it, he looks at it and sees the same black stuff in the blood. He tells me to stay here. He claims he is going to go get someone better suited in this than he is. 

Another doctor walks in. They examine the two syringes and the blood on my arm. Then they grab both of the syringes and walk out the door with the previous doctor waiting outside. I can see them have a discussion but I can’t hear it. The first doctor walks in while the other one leaves.

“You said someone else did this to you?” he asked.  
“Yeah. Or at least I think I did. My memory has been really hazy.” I said.  
“Specifically. What do you remember about the person you think did this?” he asked.  
“They had some weird ability to turn their fingers into sharp tendrils. They were leaking this weird black liquid and I think they injected it into me. Do you think that’s what’s in my blood? Or do you know of something like this?”  
“So…. Your blood has some very strange stuff in it. We’ve never seen anything like it. We’re going to run some tests. But in the meantime, just please stay in this room.” He said.  
“For how long?” I ask.  
“We’re not sure. If you need it, there is a bathroom through that door and a phone to call reception if you need anything. But again, please do not leave.” He said.  
“Fine.” I said before he walks out.

Well, this can’t possibly be good. The changes to my body aren’t the result of a blessing and this stuff in my blood is baffling the doctors. I see a lounge chair in the corner of the room. I put my shirt back on and sit down in it. Trying to find a way to distract myself.

I pull out my phone to see if I got any messages. Placido is asking where I am. I tell him I needed to go to the hospital. Hopefully he lets the others know, I don’t have the energy to tell them myself.

I browse through the apps on my phone. Social media, games, videos, anything to take my mind off of things. But I suddenly hear a toilet flush. I turn towards the bathroom I haven’t looked inside of yet. The door opens.

Out steps a green-scaled reptile of some kind carrying an odd flute. There is a mohawk of light green feathers or something similar to feathers on their head. Are they a hybrid of some kind? I can’t tell if they are male or female, it’s always tough with reptiles. They look around and lock eyes with me.

“Hey there.” they said in a voice that doesn’t aid me in figuring out what pronouns to use for them.  
“How long were you in there? And how did you do it so quietly?” I ask.  
“That’s quite a personal question to ask someone you just met.” They said as they sat down in another chair across the room from me.  
“Fine. Forget I asked.” I said, looking back down at my phone.  
“You seem troubled young man. What’s wrong?” they said.  
“I'm waiting on a blood test. Though I'm not hopeful of what they’ll find.” I said.  
“I’m waiting on a test too. I understand how nervous it can make a person. Luckily I have something for that.” they said as they picked up their flute.

I’m about to ask them not to play. But they begin before I can say anything. All it takes is a few notes before I feel it. A song that almost puts me in a trance. The melody they play soothing every tense fiber of my being. It’s like the initial calmness from Laxmi’s blessing. But an entirely different breed of calm, however that would work. I lean back into the chair as they play. They slowly end their song after who knows how long.

“You’re right. The doctors here won’t understand what’s wrong with you.” They said as they put away their flute.  
“Wh…. Huh?” I say as I snap out of my stupor.  
“The stuff in your blood isn’t the result of a blessing. It is something that hasn’t been used for a long while.” They said.  
“Wait. How do you know that?” I said.

Just then, the doctor from earlier walks in. The door obstructs my view of the reptile. When it closes, they’re gone. The doctor is saying something but I’m sitting there trying to figure out where they could have gone. The doctor notices I’m distracted and calls out to me.

“Excuse me? Mr. Flanding. Did you hear me?” he said.  
“N-no sorry. I was distracted.” I said as I drew my attention away from the vacant chair.  
“Well what I was saying is that your medical condition is completely unknown to us. It could be something incredibly rare or entirely new. We just don’t know yet. We need to move you into a room so we can figure out just what you have.” He said.  
“You mean like isolation?” I said.  
“I don’t think that is necessary. Whatever is in your blood seems to vanish soon after it leaves your body. You’re not contagious as far as we can tell. But we’ll put you in a private room to be safe.” He said.  
“Oh gods. This is just what I need.” I said as I stood up.  
“I understand you have a phobia of hospitals. Trust me, we wouldn’t keep you here if it wasn’t serious. And anomalous black goop in your blood can’t possibly be good.” He said.  
“I think it's making me hallucinate too. I was talking to someone I thought was in this room.” I said.  
“I’ll make a note of that. Come on, I’ll show you to your room.” He said as we walked out the door.

My room is simple. But it is clearly made for long term stays. I text Placido about my situation. He’s the only person who will talk to me at this point anyway. I’ll have to see what I’ll need for however long I’m staying here. The doctor is standing by the door, watching me look around my small room. 

He says something about my room having a nice view at least. I look out the window and see the ocean. I’m on the 6th floor of the building so I can at least look over the buildings. But then I look down and I see something on a roof. Another pale figure looking up at me.

I feel an immense rage suddenly well up inside me. But I have enough sense to tear my vision away from the window. I feel the burning inside my body again. I fall to my hands and knees, grunting with my hands balled into tight fists. 

The doctor immediately asks what’s wrong. I can’t say anything, I just growl. My fingers begin to tingle and I see the fur on my arms begin to turn white. The doctor shouts for help, but I can’t make out his words over the intense pain and euphoria that feels so familiar to me. 

I stand up, my arms wrapped around myself with my claws poking into my flesh. I’m trying to stop it, stop whatever is happening. Trying to suppress the rage. A security guard comes in and is quickly freaked out by what he sees. He pulls out a stun gun and aims it at me. I look him in the eyes and let out a horrific shriek. 

He fires and the two prongs embed themselves into my chest. The subsequent shock of electricity shoots through my body. It slows my movements, but doesn’t stop them. The security guard turns up the voltage on the gun in response. After a long sustained shock I fall to the ground paralyzed and twitching. I see someone run up with a syringe of anesthetic and injects it into my neck. The world slowly melts away….

I’m in my dorm room again. It’s the day I moved into the academy. I had been told they couldn’t find me a roommate yet. I was so sure I would get one soon. I’m still waiting on that.

There are boxes all around my dorm. Most are empty while some are still ready for unpacking. I hear a knock on the door. I look through the peephole to see Marwha on the other side. I open it up to invite her in. She seems distraught.

She tells me her roommate isn’t just her roommate. He is to be her husband at graduation. She’s being forced to marry this random guy she’s never met. Marwha holds her face in her hands as she sits on my couch. I sit beside her.

She goes on about how it all makes sense now. Why her family kept meeting their spouses at Satvius. They were all forced into it like she was. Yet they are all happy with it for the most part. She wonders why no one bothered to tell her this. 

I put an arm around her shoulder. I tell her I’m with her every step of the way. We’ll find a way to stop it from happening to her. I suggest she asks her roommate what he thinks of this. She looks up and decides to do that right now, hoping to get him on her side. She gets up and leaves me alone. and hoping there is a way I can help more.


	7. Many Questions and Few Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby finally learns what is causing the changes. Unfortunately, knowing isn't enough to stop it.

I finally come to my senses. My memory of what happened is much clearer. My body was changing but I managed to resist it. Then the hospital staff sedated me. I can imagine why. It was probably for the better.

I’m lying in a hospital bed. Thick straps holding me down, yet they feel a bit loose. Did I gain some muscle mass during the transformation and it reverted to normal afterwards? Whatever the case may be, I’m still strapped to this bed and I can’t really move.

The room I’m in isn’t the same one I passed out in. I don’t see any windows save for the one looking out into the hallway. The door is an airlock of some kind. Is this where they put people who are really contagious or something? I look around and see a heart monitor I’m hooked up to. 

I’m looking around when I hear a knocking on the window. I see another doctor I don’t recognize, a female bloodhound. She grabs a microphone from out of my view and taps on it to test the sound. I hear the resulting noise from a speaker on the wall.

“Hello? Can you hear me?” she said.  
“Yeah…. What’s going on? Why am I tied down?” I said, the beeping from the heart monitor slowly getting faster.  
“Wait. You don’t remember? What do you remember from earlier today?” she asked.  
“I started to change, I got shocked, and I was sedated.” I said.  
“After we sedated you, it didn’t last long. Soon you were thrashing about, screaming the same demand at us over and over.” She said.  
“What was I saying?” I asked.  
“Return me, I shouldn’t be here.” She said.  
“I…. don’t remember any of that. No idea what it means either.” I said.  
“This is more serious than we thought. I just hope to the gods it’s not contagious.” She said.  
“What is? What’s happening to me!?” I said.  
“Whatever is inside you. It’s not the result of a blessing. There are blessings that can cause changes as drastic as yours, but we can confirm there is no blessing acting on you at all. We have never seen anything like it before.” She said.  
“What then!? What could be doing this to me?” I ask.  
“We’re trying to find that out.” She said.  
“Well, why am I strapped down like this?” I said.  
“We didn’t know when your transformation can happen again.” she said.  
“I do know one thing about this. They aren’t random! I have been seeing these things that are vaguely shaped like people. Just looking at them causes me to change! I saw one out the window and I looked away in time to stop it from getting worse!” I said.  
“I’ll be sure to inform them. But for now, you will need to stay bound until our expert arrives to examine you.” She said.  
“How long will that take?” I ask.  
“They’re twenty minutes away last I heard. Now before I go, I need to ask you some things about your current health.” She said.

She asks me all sorts of things. Do I feel any pain, any strange symptoms, how am I doing mentally, etcetera. Physically, I feel totally fine. I would think whatever the hell happened to me would leave me feeling some kind of result of the no doubt immense strain such a thing would have on my body. But honestly, I can’t name one physical gripe I have. 

Mentally however, I’m not doing so well. Being locked in a room with no windows to the outside world and hooked up to all these machines while the doctors are totally stumped as to what’s wrong with me. It’s like someone watched every nightmare I ever had and used it as inspiration to construct one of the biggest collection of fears I have ever experienced. If only I was hooked up to a morphine drip, then I could at least use that to distract myself from all this.

I hear the doors open. In walks someone wearing a familiar uniform. One I’ve seen around for most of my childhood. The one wearing it is familiar too. It takes me a second to realize why he is here and who he is. 

Mayur Shinsain, Marwha’s father. He has worked with the Keepers of Providence for as long as I’ve known him. I never really looked into what exactly he does. But I know he’s a good ways up the chain of command. His fur is a paler brown than Marwha’s more reddish coloration. He’s wearing a yellow uniform with several medals and other things commending him pinned on. He looks down at me with concern.

“Toby…. What’s happened to you?” he asks in his oddly comforting voice for someone of his profession.  
“I…. I don’t know. I have no idea what’s going on I swear.” I said.  
“The police here called for a K.o.P. operative to come down to Crocus to investigate an anomalous murder. I had hoped to use this opportunity to have a pleasant visit with my children. However, when I found Marwha, she was distraught at something you had done to her. She wouldn’t tell me what though. So when I was told of the incident earlier today that you caused. I assumed something must be wrong. Am I right for thinking as such?” he said.  
“Yes. Something is wrong with me. Something very, very, wrong. Do you have a way to help me?” I said.  
“Maybe. First I have to look through what the hospital has been able to find out.” He said as he sat down.

He pulls out a medical chart, no doubt it’s mine. He silently reads through it. Asking for confirmation about certain facts. Which I respond to truthfully. Eventually, he puts down the chart and looks at me again.

“You say someone’s blessing is doing this to you. Do you have any idea who they are?” he asked.  
“I’ve only seen them once, though I think I might have seen them another time too. My memory has been fuzzy ever since this started. They were totally covered up save for their fingertips. I couldn’t make out anything distinct like a tail or ears or antlers. No idea what species they could be.” I said.  
“And you’re certain this person is the one responsible?” he said.  
“Their fingertips were able to morph into these needle-like tendrils and they were oozing black stuff. They injected it into me. I saw them on the night of the festival where I think they injected me for the first time.” I said.  
“Hmm…. The doctor I met mentioned something about a trigger of sorts causing your transformations. A strange person-shaped figure?” he asked.  
“I see these things, they just appear in my sight when I least expect it. My mind is focused on them, filling me with rage for no reason. That murder you were sent here for, I think I did that to one of them.” I said.  
“You killed it?” he asked.  
“I killed that one I think, I saw one at the exact spot where the murder happened before blacking out. Then I saw another one in an alley that I killed.” I said.  
“Are these actual people?” he asked.  
“I don’t think so…. They look soulless. Like a clothing store mannequin made of flesh. Didn’t even react to any pain I inflicted on it.” I said.  
“So…. As long as we keep these things from being seen by you. There isn’t a way you can transform?” he said.  
“I believe so.” I said.  
“I will talk with the doctors about unstrapping you and taking measures to help. I’ll do some more research on what your body is going through and report my findings to my superiors.” He said as he stood up.

He leaves the room. Ten minutes later, the doctor who spoke to me after I woke up enters. She gently removes the straps, but she urges me not to try to leave the room. I reluctantly stay on the bed. 

She then grabs my medical chart and tells me what they found regarding my physical condition. My current state was compared to a physical I got when the school year started. Somehow, I’m healthier than I was before. I wasn’t doing anything different, yet nearly everything about me is improved. I do feel good, but I figured that was medication or something.

I ask her if I can have my phone. She points to the bedside table where I see it laying there. I check the time. I arrived at the hospital around 10 AM, now it’s 4 PM. Was I really out for almost six hours? Why don’t I feel hungry? I haven’t actually eaten anything at all today.

I turn off my phone and get a glimpse of myself on the reflection in the black screen. I stare at what I see for a few seconds. I look around and see a mirror on the wall. I stand up and move in front of the mirror as the doctor asks what I’m doing.

I look in the mirror and see white fur on my neck. I quickly throw off my shirt and see my entire upper torso and even my arms up to my elbows are white. My teeth are still sharp as well. But what’s worrying the most to me is my eyes. They’re almost totally black with white pupils. Yet my eyesight isn’t any different than it was before. 

Is that how this is working? Each time I change, my normal body gradually becomes more like this? If I change enough times am I going to be stuck like that!? Maybe if I prevent any changes for long enough, I can get back to normal. 

I sit back down on my bed and grab my phone again. Still no word from Marwha or anyone else. I hope they at least know where I am. I sigh and the doctor says she will be monitoring me if I need any help. She gets up and leaves me alone in the room.

I distract myself however I can for the rest of the day. But around 8 PM, I see Mayur at the window again. He walks into the room and sits down. I had spent a good while explaining the situation to my father over my phone. I tell my dad I’ll text him later and hang up before facing Mayur.

“So we have a theory as to what’s wrong with you.” He said.  
“What is it?” I ask.  
“Well first, I should inform you of this. Due to your volatile nature during these changes and the one behind them is actively seeking you out in the area. We have decided you can’t stay in this hospital. You are to be moved to a secure K.o.P. facility for study and potential treatment.” He said.  
“For how long?” I ask.  
“However long it takes for us to understand what is happening to you and if we can stop it. This wasn’t my decision to make. But they have already dispatched some agents to come transport you.” He said.  
“That’s…. disconcerting. But you said you had a theory as to what was wrong with me, what is it?” I ask.  
“I would rather not tell you until we know if it’s true or not. But we can find out if it is right here.” He said as the door opened.

Marwha walks into the room. She is looking uncomfortable, no doubt because of me. I’m surprised to see her here at all honestly. Is she going to use her blessing on me?

“Hello…. I’m sorry for-” I begin to say before she interrupts me.  
“I’m not trusting a word out of your mouth until the normal Toby I know says it. So shut it.” She said as she grabbed my leg and looked at a vacant spot in the air above it.  
“What do you see?” Mayur asked as she read words only she could see.  
“By the gods. You were right.” Marwha said as she looked into thin air with an expression of shock.  
“What? What is it?” I ask.  
“This stuff in your blood. It’s cruor.” Mayur said.  
“And what is that?” I ask.  
“You know those monsters the gods made during their war that still run around today? Like the Trojan that got into Marwha’s head? The same ones the K.o.P. is seeking to wipe out? That’s what they are made of.” Mayur said.  
“But what my blessing is telling me is strange. Normally the Cruor is specialized to work with whatever monster it is supposed to be. The stuff in you is crude, no way would a deity of any kind make something so sloppy.” Marwha said.  
“What are you saying?” Mayur asked.  
“Whoever did this didn’t just liquefy some monster and put it in you. All Cruor comes from the same base substance. They must have gotten some and tried to make their own variation of it.” Marwha said.  
“That’s something my superiors will want to hear. Can you do that thing you said you were working on? I need to photograph this.” Mayur said as he pulled out his phone.  
“Yeah, but do it quick. I can’t hold it for long.” Marwha said.

Marwha begins pressing down on my leg and squeezing. I’m about to ask her to stop when I notice something appearing in my vision. A blue two-dimensional rectangle floating in the air. I can see words through the back of it, I can’t read them because they are upside down but I can see they are there. Marwha can make her windows visible to others now? I wish I found this out under better circumstances because that is pretty cool.

Mayur takes some pictures of the text and immediately steps outside to talk to someone over the phone. Marwha takes her hand off of me and looks out at her dad, unable to hear him through the wall. Then she looks at me. She no longer looks angry, but I can tell she is still hurting from what I said.

“Do you need anything from your dorm?” she asked.  
“I’m going to be out of school for a while apparently. So some of my things will be appreciated. I’ll text you with what I need.” I said.  
“Good. But before I leave. Tell me, who was talking that day? You or whatever is inside you?” Marwha said.  
“I’ve never blamed you for those things. I would have only said that if I had forgotten our friendship entirely.” I said.  
“We’ll see how that compares to the Toby I speak to once he has been cured.” Marwha said as she began to walk out, I was going to let her leave but then I had a sudden realization.  
“Wait! If this thing gets worse, and I somehow lose control and escape to the point where the K.o.P. can’t find me. Talk to Placido, he will know where I am.” I said.  
“How will he know?” she asked.  
“He can sense where the clothing he makes is. Should he choose to anyway. If you can, have him make me some clothes for me to use just in case.” I said.  
“I’ll let him know. Text me what you need.” She said as she left the room.

Well, I hope that repaired some of our friendship. She isn’t convinced I’m mentally sound right now, which I’m probably not. But at least she accepts that the one who said those things to her wasn’t entirely me. I will try to make it up to her once this is over. At least I hope it ends.

I’m stuck in that room until midnight. Marwha thankfully came back with a suitcase of what I requested before then. I’m once again visited by Mayur. Outside the room I can see two K.o.P. agents waiting for me. They aren’t the same kind that Mayur is, they’re wearing body armor and have shotguns strapped to their backs. But I can see they are colored black and yellow. I remember Mayur showing me and Marwha guns like that when we were younger. Those are shotguns loaded with stun rounds, shotgun shell-sized versions of typical stun-guns. It won’t kill me, but it should subdue me if I transform.

Mayur explains that they are here to take me to the facility. While I imagine it won’t be much different, I am glad to finally be out of this hospital. Mayur says he will stay here to gather the information the hospital has gathered on me to bring over to the facility as well. My life is in their hands, I hope they can get me the help I need.

He says there is a safety precaution they need to take before they can transport me though. He pulls out a thick blindfold, with the strap even having a padlock on it. He explains that since my transformations are caused by seeing those strange things and that they keep appearing in very convenient situations. He theorizes whatever is controlling them is likely aware of what I’m doing. I don’t know how they could be, but it makes too much sense for me to not suspect it. They may try to induce a transformation during transport. So I am to wear this until I arrive at the facility. I’m not thrilled about giving up my eyesight, but I’m even less thrilled about potentially transforming again. So I don’t make any objections. I put the blindfold on and Mayur locks it tight. 

He helps me up and hands me my suitcase to carry. With his hands on my shoulders, he walks me out to the guards. I hear the two guards start walking with us. One in front and the other in the back. We go through the hospital and out to the parking lot. I hear the door to a vehicle open and I’m led inside. They sit me down on a seat and buckle my seatbelt for me. I hear the other guards get in and a third person says they are ready to go. Mayur says how he will see me soon and closes the door I walked through. The vehicle starts up and we begin to move. 

“What’s this kid’s story?” the driver says.  
“Someone’s trying to fill him with cruor. He’s got monster goop inside of him doing all sorts of shit to his body.” one of the agents said.  
“Okay…. But why? Are they trying to make him into a monster or use it as some kind of physical enhancement thing?” the driver asked.  
“Who knows. But he could potentially be a new thing we have to look out for. You’re obligated to know since you’re driving us. But command wants all information regarding him kept under wraps until we truly know what’s going on with him.” The agent said.  
“Is he dangerous? Cause all he has is a blindfold?” the driver said.  
“As long as I don’t see something specific. I should be fine.” I said.  
“Well then feel free to nap. We have a bit of a ride anyway.” the agent said.

I take his advice and recline my seat back as far as it can go. I relax as best I can and try to sleep. I lay there for a while, alone with my thoughts. The agents have stopped talking so there is only the sound of the engine. I finally feel calmer.

Then I see a flame flickering in the pitch blackness of my vision. A flame from a lighter, I see a scaly green hand holding it. A reptilian face is illuminated from the flame. It’s the same reptile I saw before!

“I’ll admit. Seeing professionals try to understand your condition is amusing.” They said.  
“No. You’re not real. The cruor is making me hallucinate or something!” I said.  
“I am real. And I’m here to say that you are destined to become a monster if they can’t find a solution.” They said.  
“How do I know you’re not the one doing this!?” I said.  
“I swear I am not responsible. I’m just a reptile who enjoys the flute.” They said.  
“Whatever is wrong with me is messing with my head and you are in my head right now!” I said.  
“A coincidence I assure you. But you should wake up.” They said.

The flame is extinguished and I suddenly feel more alert. Was that a dream, or something else? I sit up in my seat. One of the guards asks if anything is wrong. I was about to say nothing, but then I had an idea.

“You all wouldn’t happen to be familiar with some kind of feathered green reptile fellow with a flute are you?” I said.  
“That’s classified. Who told you about that?” an agent said.  
“No one. I’ve seen them twice today and I’m suspicious.” I said.  
“Why didn’t you mention this?” the other agent asked.  
“At first I thought it was just a hallucination caused by this stuff in me. But I just had a second encounter with him when I was dozing off there.” I said.  
“Hold on. You mean like a dream or something?” an agent asked.  
“I think so. I mean I was looking at him and I can’t exactly see anything right now.” I said.  
“Should we report this?” an agent asked.  
“Hey driver. Don’t these things record every drive you make in these vehicles?” an agent said.  
“Yeah. Just have him describe the dream and radio command. They’ll get the recording when we get there.” the driver said.  
“Alright, you tell me everything you remember. Every detail.” The agent said.

I was about to tell them everything. But then I heard a noise like something hitting the top of the vehicle. Then I feel it swerve. The driver shouts about how he can’t see anything. I feel the vehicle go off road and come to a stop. The two agents cock their guns and tell me to stay inside. Not much I can do with this blindfold so I obey their command.

Then I hear metal being torn apart. The door next to me is ripped off, I feel the cool night air against my skin. Something cuts my seatbelt and yanks me out of my seat. I’m thrown onto the grass beside what I can hear is a busy road. 

Next thing I hear is gunfire. I can’t tell if the agents are using those stun rounds or actual bullets. I feel someone grab me by my neck and four needles stab into my flesh. They inject something into me, my body goes limp. I’m dropped to the ground unable to move. 

I hear the agents fighting something. It’s growling at them, making grunts and other animalistic noises. I’m scared, I can’t see and there is a monster running around. I don’t pay attention to the noise, I just lie there and hope one of the agents calls my name. But I soon notice that the gunfire has stopped.

“A blindfold huh? Just how much did you tell them!? No matter, they’re not finding you again.” a familiar voice said before I fade into unconsciousness.


	8. Underestimations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby tries to escape from the stranger trying to make him into a monster.

I awaken inside somewhere unfamiliar. The blindfold is thankfully gone now and my eyes take a while to adjust to the bright room. I’m looking at a concrete ceiling, I’m lying on my back. My first coherent thought is how I’m tired of blacking out. My second is about why I can’t move. My body is strapped down tight. I’m thankfully still wearing my clothes.

Immediately the face of that hooded and masked person looks over me. I immediately try to use my blessing to get myself free or at least knock them away. But I can’t, it feels incredibly weak. I can feel something tight around the top of my head, it must be a suppression headband. 

“You know. It wouldn’t have had to come to this if you just behaved.” They said.  
“What the hell are you doing to me!?” I said.  
“Injecting you with my latest batch of cruor. Well I can only inject you every so often, but that’s my main goal right now.” they said.  
“Dammit! Why!?” I shout as I struggle against the restraints.  
“Because the world needs this!” they said.  
“What do you even mean?” I said.  
“You’re useless in your current form! All three pantheons have the same goal and it’s a mad dash to see who gets there first. And you can’t contribute.” They said.  
“….What?” I said.  
“You’re unneeded! Your contribution would be negligible at best before you would be cast aside like trash. All I’m doing is recycling.” They said.  
“What plan!? The hell are you talking about!?” I said.  
“What the plan is doesn’t matter. It’s what happens after is what the world needs to worry about. There is going to be another war, I know it.” They said.  
“What are you talking about!? There was only ever one war in history. And that was between the gods! They swore never to do that again!” I said.  
“There are more living things in the world than just the gods. This war will be between people.” They said.  
“That’s crazy! None of the religions have a military. The K.o.P. is the closest thing anyone has to a large armed force! And they’re neutral!” I said.  
“You’re absolutely right. So how can we help these people? By giving them something just as powerful.” They said.  
“What do you mean?” I said.  
“Perhaps it would be easier to simply show you the first experiment.” They said.

They did something out of my view and the surface I’m bound to is tilted upwards just enough for me to see the entrance of the room I’m in. It’s just as barren as the ceiling. I hear something walk towards us, it sounds like someone with hooves. Then, I see something walk inside. 

At one point it was probably a doe of some kind. Her fur is white like mine, her eyes are also the same shade of black, and she is around ten feet tall. She’s looking right at me, her pointed teeth bared as that strange black substance seeps from her mouth. Her hooved hands and feet are long and sharpened, she looks decently muscular too. Is this what he’s trying to make me into?

“What is that?” I said, scared of the being standing before me.  
“My first test subject. She wanted nothing more than to help The Grand Design become the victor in the coming war. We both saw it coming, but it was her idea to do this. She had chronic illness for most of her life, it ravaged her body over time. So I tried to help her.” The stranger said.  
“So you turned her into a monster!?” I said.  
“She volunteered, she knew what would happen. She’s still in there at the helm. If she objected she could have killed me at any time.” They said.  
“Well I didn’t volunteer!” I said.  
“You were cast aside. All I’m doing is picking up what they threw away.” They said.  
“Why though!?” I said.  
“Like I said. The powers that be are woefully underprepared for a war. Eventually when the time comes, they’ll be defeated easily. You are to be an equalizer. Give our side a fighting chance.” They said.  
“How are you going to do that with just two of whatever she is?” I said.  
“I’ll make more. I need to refine the process. Figure out the perfect blend of physical and psychic adjustments. Once I’m done with you, the both of you will help me gather more.” They said.  
“Fuck that!” I shouted.  
“Trust me. It’s the best way you can help The Grand Design.” They said as they held up their hand with elongated needle-like fingers.

I wince as their fingers stab into me and inject the cruor. I feel my body begin to change like it did before. But on a much lesser level. The stranger removes their fingers from my neck and they morph back to normal.

“I need to find a way to improve the refining process. It takes me hours to get enough to give you a full dose. Maybe I’ll make the next one into something to address that issue.” They said.  
“Let me go! This has got to be heresy or at the very least illegal!” I shouted.  
“No heresy here, trust me. But you are right. I don’t want the K.o.P. to find out what I’m doing to you. I know what you already told them. So I don’t intend to let you go anytime soon.” They said as they shifted me back to a flat position staring at the ceiling.

The stranger and the monster leave the room. The entrance is closed with a heavy metal door and audibly locked shut. The subtle changes happening to my body have stopped. But now I feel incredibly angry. Granted this is the first time since all this happened where being mad is justified. 

Dammit! What is this person’s problem with me! What do they mean about me being cast aside? The academy treats me well, I haven’t been ex-communicated or anything either. This jerk is being vague on purpose. Likely to stop me from knowing too much in case I escape. Well guess what asshole, I’m going to try and get out. I’ll make your legs crush themselves under their own weight if I get the chance too.

I can’t move very much. These straps holding me down are the same kind as the hospital. The only meaningful thing I can do is use my blessing. The suppression headband on my head can’t outright disable my blessing. Just how much can I still do? I make a gravity field above me. It’s an inch in diameter and has barely any strength in it. I try to make another but I can only sustain one at a time. Maybe I can still use this. 

I re-make the field and aim it at the headband. I angle it to try and make it slip off my head. These headbands are typically not much different from a typical sweatband aside from the medallion. I heard heavy-duty ones exist though. This one on me must just be a normal version. 

I try as hard as I can. Attempting to focus as much force into the small field as I can. I feel it move ever so slightly. Eventually, I hit the sweet spot and it begins to slide off. It falls off my head and lands onto the bed I’m strapped to. 

I instantly feel my blessing’s strength return. I make several more inch-wide fields on each of the straps holding me down. The straps are pulled upwards with such force that they snap in two. I quickly roll off the bed and get to my feet. I use my blessing to try and rip the door off of its hinges. The metal door creaks as the stress of the force acting on it tries to force it open. The hinges don't come off but instead are ripped out of the concrete wall with a loud crack. Followed by the sound of a heavy metal door being blasted off and landing onto a hard concrete floor. I have no doubt they know I’ve escaped now. I need to get out of here quick, wherever here is.

Outside of the room is a small basement of some kind. Nothing else here, this building must be abandoned because clearly no one has tended to it in a long while. I can’t see any other entrances save for a staircase leading up and a small window near the ceiling with daylight shining through. I need a plan. 

I shouldn’t go after them. As much as I want to crush their bones, I imagine that’s what they will expect. They’re able to make me black out. I can’t really do much against that. Not to mention whatever that doe can do. I think that’s what attacked the agents last night. If an armored car and three people with guns couldn’t stop it, I don’t see myself having much luck against it either.

Wait. They said they don’t want the K.o.P. finding out what they are doing to me. If I really want to hurt this bastard, I need to get out of here and report this. I think that’s my best option. Now I only need to think of how best to escape.

Something jumps down the stairs. To my horror, it’s another one of those person-shaped things. Fuck! Where do these things factor into that jerk’s plan? I quickly look away as I feel myself begin to grow warmer. 

Out of desperation, I create a gravity field at its feet. I send it flying back up the stairs. But it’s not enough, I can feel myself changing more. I look towards the window. I can’t fit through, but I have another idea.

I create a large field right outside of it. A torrent of gravitational force tears through the concrete wall, dragging debris and dirt from outside into the basement. I jump out of the way to avoid being buried in this miniature landslide I’ve created. I shut off the field, the window is now a large hole with a ramp of rubble and dirt leading out. I’m sure I just screwed up the foundation of the building, but I don’t care about that right now. 

I struggle to climb up through the hole as my body changes. Making that hole was rather loud, so I had attracted a few people nearby who are curious about it. However, despite my best efforts to resist, I am fully turned by the time I make it to the top. I feel the rage welling up inside me.

My eyes dart around my surroundings, trying to establish where I am. From the looks of it, I’m in some small town. Definitely not Crocus though, none of it seems familiar. The building I was in seems to be a dilapidated house. Around me are other homes, as well as people looking at me from a safe distance. 

I try to tell them to get me help. But the only sound I make is a bestial mess of grunts and snarls. In my frustration of not being able to communicate, I let out a roar. This sends the bystanders scrambling. I obviously look dangerous, it’s a wonder why it took them this long to leave. 

I run out into the street, aimlessly wandering since that stranger hasn’t given me any direction and I can barely control myself as is. I can feel the inner rage beginning to grow. I want to lash out at something, but there is nothing to direct my anger at. But as I look back towards the house I escaped from, I see the stranger looking at me through a window.

Oddly enough, I don’t feel anger. Instead I just feel fear and begin sprinting away from the home. No real direction in mind. Just anywhere away from that person and those things of theirs.

I vault over fences and run through yards as I try to put some distance between us. I leap over a tall wooden fence and run out onto a road. But in my panicked sprint, I fail to notice a car heading towards me. The car rams into my left side. I’m thrown into the street, tumbling across the hot asphalt. At that speed, I should have broken a rib or my arm. Yet they both feel fine.

The car screeches to a halt as my head spins from the impact. The boar driving it steps out to ask if I’m okay. But they stop mid-sentence when they see I am not a normal person. I stare at him with my black eyes and my teeth bared. His eyes go wide and he quickly gets back into his car and locks the doors.

I leap onto his car and slash at it with my claws. Somehow they can pierce the metal hood. The boar panics and reaches down to get something. He jumps out of the car and aims a pistol at me. I have a hard time processing the threat he poses and just stare at him.

He fires a single shot. The bullet grazes the right side of my torso, tearing through my clothes and taking a small chunk of my flesh with it. I feel a small tinge of pain from the wound. I know I should feel more, but it only feels like I had just scraped it on the ground. Whatever pain is there soon fades.

I glare at the frightened boar, deciding he will be my next target. I think he somehow knows this as he turns around and sprints away. I begin to give chase, fully intent on tearing him apart with my claws or smashing him flat with my blessing. I can’t hold myself back anymore, I want to kill something.

But after a few steps, I hear another gunshot. I feel another smidgen of pain on my left leg this time. Only now it can’t support my weight, I collapse onto the hot asphalt. I look behind me to see my leg is riddled with holes, further away I see another random person holding a shotgun aimed at me. They were likely trying to help the boar. That son of a whore, I’ll kill him before the other one!

I use my arms to pull myself over to them. They’re fumbling to try and load another shell into the shotgun. I hear footsteps nearby. I see another person trying to sneak up on me with a shovel. But they stop when a familiar voice calls out.

“Don’t get close to him! He has a blessing that can control gravity! If you get within 20 feet of him, he can flatten you in an instant!” a feathered green reptile shouts from the sidewalk.

That bastard! They’re the one doing this, I know it! My rage intensifies and I begin to quickly crawl towards them. But as I crawl, I hear another gunshot and feel myself get hit in the back with several pellets. 

While they don’t hurt much more than the other shots I’ve taken. The pellets that hit must have nicked something important. My senses are all a blur right now and it’s getting harder to breathe. Did one of those hit my lungs!?

I hear sirens getting closer. My chest feels tight and my vision is getting darker. I can’t tell if this is me blacking out normally, or death. Even when I’m filler with this seething rage, I still feel afraid. I can’t move any more, I go limp on the street. Everything goes dark.

No dreams, no coherent thoughts. Just darkness and confusion. But almost as quick as it came, the blackness begins to fade away. I’m staring at a metal floor, lying on my stomach. I’m inside a vehicle of some kind, looks like an ambulance. I hear a voice nearby.

“-aside from the house, the only damage caused was to a car. He was fired upon by several scared civilians in self-defense. Thankfully one of them had assumed he was some sort of monster and called us. We managed to get there before Flanding succumbed to his wounds. Despite the severity of them, his body is healing rapidly. They still needed a blood transfusion and other treatments to keep him alive long enough to get him stable. Thankfully we loaded him onto an ambulance where we could give treatment away from the eyes of the civilians. He is being transported to headquarters as we speak.” A female voice said into a phone.

My whole body feels strange. I must be on painkillers or something. I try to sit up but a sudden shooting pain through me body causes me to grunt and lay back down again. The other one in the back with me is another K.o.P. agent. She notices I’m awake.

“Mr. Flanding, are you in there?” she asked.  
“Yes….” I reply weakly since speaking causes a pain deep in my chest.  
“Good, you shouldn’t talk anymore. One of your lungs got punctured. Somehow your body is already fixing it. You can breathe fine now but the vibrations from talking might irritate it some. We’re going to secure you armored transport and an escort before bringing you to the facility. Those three with you before were lucky to have survived. They won’t get you again this time.” She said, I looked at her and smiled.


	9. Study of the Useless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby's time at the K.o.P. facility reveals new information on his condition.

It’s been a week since I arrived here. Every moment I have been studied by scientists trying to figure out what is causing this. I’ve undergone nearly every medical test I know of. This place isn’t much better than a hospital. 

I’ve spent most of my time inside a room much like a prison cell. I think this was meant to hold dangerous monsters and they just put in things like furniture to make it more comfortable for someone like me. I only ever leave my room to go undergo some kind of test. Still they don’t know what is behind this. 

The stranger injecting me with that crap is obviously causing this. But they tried stuff like hooking me up to a dialysis machine for who knows how long. No matter how much of that gunk they remove from my blood, more keeps showing up. Even without the stranger injecting it. 

I haven’t changed into that monster since the day I was shot. But that hasn’t done anything to help my body. As usual, the white fur has spread more. Now my entire arms are covered. My hands haven’t turned back, they remain the clawed appendages from before. I’ve tried having them trimmed. They grow back within the day.

But what’s even worse is that I have become feverish. Maybe I had gotten one of those gunshot wounds infected. For the past few days I’ve been running a temperature, I ache deep in my stomach, I have bouts of delirium, and I’ve been shaking. They’ve been trying to help me. But no matter what medication they give me, I’m not getting better. It’s honestly baffling to us since my body can now apparently survive and heal gunshot wounds but it can’t handle a fever.

Right now I’m standing in a bathroom after having thrown up into this toilet. I look in the mirror, what I see is an entirely different person. Those black eyes, that white fur, the sharp teeth, and the horribly sickly appearance. This has got to be the worst I state I have ever been in. Even worse than that time at the amusement park.

I haven’t had any contact with the outside world since I got here. I'm allowed to keep my phone to entertain myself. But all of my internet use is carefully monitored. They don’t want me to share what I’m going through. They say if word gets out that cruor can make people into hard to kill monsters, then that won’t lead to anything good. I can see where they are coming from. The less crazy people like that stranger the better.

Officially I’m taking an indeterminate break from my classes due to severe health issues. Which sort of is the case anyway. Marwha and my dad have been forced to stay quiet about my condition. The staff at the hospital have also received a hefty bribe to keep quiet as well. This situation I'm in is more serious than I thought. 

I’ve told them all I know about the stranger and that weird experiment of theirs. The K.o.P. are still trying to pin down who they are. That house I was locked in was abandoned and anyone who was there had fled the scene by the time I was recovered. Whoever they are. They’re doing whatever they can to stay hidden. 

But then I told them about the reptile I have been seeing. Since I still suspect they’re actually the one behind this. Whenever they are mentioned, the mood of whoever is interviewing me changes. They go from curious to serious. Any questions I ask get unanswered when they are involved. They won’t tell me anything about them. The only answer they have given me regarding it is that “Details surrounding that individual are classified.” 

I stumble out of the bathroom and sit on my bed. Thankfully my bag of things I asked Marwha to get was recovered from the vehicle I was kidnapped from. I’m sweating even with the air conditioning turned up as high as it will go. My shirt is totally soaked, I take it off and throw it to the floor with a wet splat.

Someone opens the door and walks in. A mallard woman in a doctor’s coat. She’s the one who has been in charge of my health and any medical tests. She looks at me while holding a chart in her hands.

“That MRI scan we gave you this morning. We believe it showed us the source of the problem. Toby, is it true you suffered from kidney failure around the age of 14?” she said.  
“Yeah. They had to take one of them out. Other worked fine though.” I said.  
“We read through your medical records when you arrived here. But due to an oddity, we completely forgot about your missing kidney until recently.” She said.  
“What kind of oddity?” I asked.  
“This.” She said as she showed me the chart.

On the chart are several images of my body. X-rays, MRI scans, and the like. It takes me a bit to realize this. But both kidneys are there! At least whatever is there looks like a kidney.

“What is that?” I said.  
“No matter how much of that gunk we get out of your system. More keeps showing up. Something is generating it. We think you somehow gained a new organ in the place where your kidney was. That is what’s creating the cruor.” She said.  
“How is that even possible!? I don’t have any new surgery scars or anything like that!” I said.  
“Cruor is supposedly capable of such a feat. They simply had to inject it into you and let it form the organ.” She said.  
“Supposedly? You mean you don’t even know?” I said.  
“Well it’s impossible to study this stuff. The moment it leaves the body, it disintegrates into nothing. Which is why the fact that whoever did this to you is somehow getting a supply of it is so concerning.” She said.  
“Well does this discovery give you any idea as to how to fix me?” I said.  
“Somewhat. First step would be removing whatever is inside you. Then we’ll basically do a sort of looped blood transfusion. The blood containing the cruor is sucked out, the cruor breaks down, then it goes right back in. Just do that for a good while and it should more or less get out of your system.” She said.  
“So. I’d have to go into surgery?” I said.  
“We don’t really have any other way of taking that thing out of you.” She said.

I let out a sigh and look down at the floor. Of everything about hospitals I can’t stand, surgery is at the top of the list. I went through it before when I had my kidney taken out. Surgery went fine with no complications. But the experience was terrifying.

Unable to move, passed out in a room full of people cutting me open and digging their hands into me. Even during a simple surgery like that I knew things could go wrong. I could bleed out entirely due to the fault of someone else. I was so stressed out about it they actually had to give me some medication beforehand so I could calm down. 

But this isn’t much different than last time. I’m afraid, but my life depends on this. I have no intention of becoming that jerk’s pet. Right now, this seems like my best bet at stopping that. I tell her I agree to the surgery. She says she’ll get the surgical team prepared. 

I don’t do much before the surgery. Feeling like absolute shit really kills any motivation to do most things. Eventually the time comes. Thankfully my fever is making even stressing about this seem like too much effort.

Some doctors wheel in a gurney for me to get on. Wearing only my underwear and a hospital gown they gave me, I climb on and lie down. I’m wheeled out of my room and down to the operating room. At least from my perspective, the surgery will be over quick. 

As I’m lying on the operating table, I begin to feel strange. Like the feverish heat is intensifying in a way that feels strangely good. The heart monitor I’m hooked up to starts beeping rapidly. The doctors try to ask me what’s wrong, but my mind is in a haze from the rush of feelings I’m having. 

I begin to shake uncontrollably. The doctors move to try and hold me down, but they soon back away instead. I can feel it, my body is changing again! But how!? I haven’t seen one of those things yet!

“You inconsiderate prick. After all the hard work I put into you, this is what you do after all I’ve done to make you into something worthy of serving The Grand Design!?” the stranger’s voice shouts in my head.  
“GET OUT OF MY HEAD! LEAVE ME ALONE!” I shout, frightening the doctors.

They all run out of the operating room. Once again, I become a monstrous version of myself. But this time it feels different. My mind, it’s clear now. I feel no different than I did before the change. No blind rage or bloodlust.

I sit up as I catch my breath from the rather exhausting transformation. I see the doctors through a window, they’re talking to one of the guards. Maybe if I can explain to them that I’m mentally stable this time, they can get to fixing me. I stand up to try and convey my message, hoping I can still say coherent words in this form.

But I see a light shining behind me. I look over my shoulder, the light is coming from my back! There is a flash of blue light and the sound of things being knocked over. Now standing in the room is the other monster from before.

The doe looks at me with her black eyes. I try to create a gravity field to pin her down, but she pounces on me and knocks me to the floor. She’s on top of me, holding me tight. Then she begins to glow blue, and so do I. Soon there is another blinding flash.

I fall only an inch, landing on some grass. We’re outside now! She still has a firm grip on my arms. If I were to use my blessing to get her off, she’d likely hang onto me and get me dragged into whatever I create. But she’s the same thing as me, I should be able to use this monstrous body to fight back! 

But I suddenly feel that deep heat again. I’m feeling exhausted, like I just ran a marathon. That on top of my fever makes most physical effort pointless to attempt now. She seems to smile and we both begin to glow blue again. 

Once again, we are suddenly somewhere else. Now I’m in a building of some kind. My head is spinning, I can barely focus enough to realize where I am. The monster lets go and gets off of me. I see the stranger stand above me.

“Finally. You’ve been a real pain in my butt you know? That stunt you pulled back at the neighborhood really got me thinking. So I splurged a bit and got something to replace that suppression headband.” They said as I feel something metallic tighten around my left arm and my attempts to make a gravity field result in nothing. 

In my daze, I can barely understand what is happening. The five pricks in the side of my neck don’t even get a response from me. But once they are removed, I suddenly feel myself getting much better. My fever seems to just fade away. Still feel tired as hell from the change though.

“Feeling better? I bet you are. I had anticipated some of the people I plan to recycle may try to run away. So I made the cruor act much like an addiction. Stop getting my injections for too long, and you’ll go through withdrawal symptoms. I’ll put a stop to that feature once I’m finished tweaking you though.” They said as they stepped on my chest to hold me down.  
“How. How did I change? Those things weren’t there!” I asked.  
“Ah yes the puppets. They’re a vital part of the conditioning process. Super easy to make too. Just get some meat from the market and add the right amount of cruor. I can control them mentally since they don’t really have any minds of their own. And that’s what I did with you. Forcing a transformation isn’t favorable or easy, but I needed a distraction so my friend could retrieve you.” They said.  
“You, you said I was cast aside. That’s your excuse for doing this to me. What do you even mean by that!?” I said.  
“I took a look at your medical records. That physical you got before going to Satvius? Doctor there found out you’re infertile. I know that academy. They’re not going to waste some lady on someone who can’t even provide the future worshippers of The Grand Design with a proper child to support them.” They said.  
“What?” I said.  
“Without the ability to directly mess with the other religions, the only way the gods can make their followers the best is through doing whatever they can to make them seem better than followers from any other religion. All of the three main ones do it!” they said.  
“The hell are you talking about!? You expect me to believe that the whole reason I’ve been alone for three years is because I can’t have kids!?” I said.  
“Your children could have made an entire bloodline of powerful blessings. Yet your parents left you with genes that made it impossible. Cruor can do many things, yet it can’t compensate for genetic shortcomings. But with it I can reclaim some of your wasted potential!” they said.

This person is crazy. They want to turn me into a monster just because I can’t have kids!? I’ll admit that’s kind of disappointing news for me to get. But it won’t make me want to become like that deer!

But then I feel something sharp poking my side through the paper gown. My hands still have claws on them! Maybe I can sever a tendon of theirs! I reach up to dig my claws into their leg. But I involuntarily stop just before I make contact with their jeans.

“Ah. Fighting back are we? Well thankfully the transformation has advanced enough for my failsafe to kick in. A little mental block preventing you from harming me.” they said.  
“DAMMIT! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!” I shout.  
“Can’t happen. As long as that cruor is in you, I’m in you. Once the process is over, I’ll be in full control. Just a bit longer.” They said.


	10. The Final Step

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the change nearly complete. Toby has one final obstacle to face before he is finished.

My situation has gotten significantly worse. I’ve been locked in this room for three days. All that’s here is a toilet and a mat on the floor for me to sleep on. Clamped around my forearm is a metallic version of a suppression band. Locked in place with no way for me to get it off on my own.

Once a day, the stranger enters the room with the doe. She holds me down while they inject me with more cruor. I’m given water and food twice a day as well. I haven’t found any clues as to where I am. The door doesn’t have any openings for me to look through, and what little glimpses I get don’t show much. 

My body now fully resembles my monstrous form. Yet my mind is mostly unchanged. I’m wearing tattered clothes the stranger gave me. Yet my underwear from Placido is still on. They don’t know about it, so my thoughts are at least safe. I hope this can help someone figure out where I am and take down this maniac.

I’ve been trying to figure out who this person could be. They are very familiar with the academy, but they are much older than any student from what I can tell. Have I met them before? I’m still not entirely sure they aren’t that strange reptile I’ve been seeing. I haven’t seen them since the neighborhood.

Maybe the reptile is all a hallucination caused by the cruor? No wait, they can’t be. The people in the neighborhood reacted to their warning! A hallucination can’t do that. Plus the K.o.P. seemed to know about them as well. They’re definitely real.

One thing I’m trying to understand about this stranger. They’re hiding every possible inch of their body from me. Are they afraid I’ll recognize them? I can’t even pin down a definite species. They’re some kind of mammal but that’s all I can gather from what little I can observe. Maybe they want to keep their identity secret so they can evade the authorities. But I imagine that can’t be hard with that doe at their side with her blessing.

I figured out the doe has a blessing that allows her to teleport. Earlier the stranger tried to get the doe to put some kind of mark on my body so her blessing can work. From what I can gather, she can place these marks on things and teleport to them. It must have a specific range or some other limitation since it took them a week to find me. But there is one upside.

This suppression band firmly secured around my arm. It’s much more potent than the cloth one I had on before. She can’t put marks on my body anymore since the band cancels them out. But my blessing is even weaker than it was before. This thing is secured with some kind of combination lock. No one has removed it yet so I can’t guess what the combination is. Nor can I even see it. The damn thing is positioned perfectly where I can’t get a clear look at it. I can’t tell if I need to enter a number or a word or whatever. I can’t really attempt to open it anyway, my claws are too big for me to try and fumble with the mechanism. Whatever this thing is made of. It’s tougher than anything my claws and my stronger-than-normal muscles can handle. The medallion is welded into the armband too, no chance of me getting that out. 

Every day they come in here with one of those person shaped things. I change and fly into a homicidal rage, tearing it apart with my claws and teeth. But now I’ve found myself obeying the stranger’s commands involuntarily when I’m in that state. I find it hard to disobey when I’m normal too. Well more like what passes as normal for me right now anyway.

The last time I changed back, I neither saw nor felt any lasting change. Has the process finished? They are implying I still have more to go. Is this not all they have to do to change me for good?

The metal door creaks as it’s opened. The doe walks in, behind her is the stranger. The doe grabs my shoulders tight. I can’t move from this spot while I’m in her grip. The stranger walks to my side.

“The time has come for the final step. Those puppets won’t give any more progress, neither will transforming again. Physically you’re everything I’ve wanted you to be. We need to work on your mental side.” They said.  
“How are you planning to do that? Train me like some kind of attack animal?” I said.  
“I’ve been doing that the whole time. Those puppets are activating the mental parts of the cruor. Making it so if you so much as see someone from another religion, you’ll tear them apart.” They said.  
“I haven’t met someone I know is from another religion yet since this started. Well except for one early on.” I said.  
“That was too early, wouldn’t have taken effect by then. It’s hard working with a subject as stubborn as you. Jeannine here, she was willing. That made it super easy. But after consulting my associates, I have come to a conclusion as to what I need to do. You need to kill someone.” They said.  
“No! I’m not killing anything!” I shouted.  
“Yet you were so eager to kill me before…. Anyway, I’m certain the mental shock will allow the cruor to take full effect. You just have to do the deed.” They said.  
“Piss off!!!!” I shout.  
“Geez, I’m trying to give your life some greater meaning. A thank you would be nice. I’ve already picked a target. My lovely assistant here will guide you to where it will happen.” They said.

The doe begins to glow and so do I. Quickly we are both teleported. I arrive there still in her grasp. When the light fades away, I recognize where we are. 

Around me are piles of scrap metal and other junk. This is the scrapyard near the Crocus shipyards. I can see the large warehouses with the familiar logos on the side. I’m definitely in Crocus. Why would it bring me here?

“Now, be good and stay put.” The stranger’s voice says to me in my head.

My body freezes up and I fall to my knees. Is this some kind of mental command they put into my head? I sit there for who knows how long, not moving a muscle. Then I hear their voice again.

“When they arrive. Kill them however you please. But in case you hesitate, I’ve provided an incentive.” They said.

I can move again. But I feel myself getting filled with that sickening bloodlust again. I’m having trouble controlling myself. I prowl around the scrapyard looking for anyone. Then I hear a voice.

“Toby! You in here? I got your text.” Marwha said not far from me.

Oh gods no. Did they lure Marwha here!? She’s the one they want me to kill! No, she doesn’t deserve this! I couldn’t live with myself if I killed her!

But I find myself moving closer to her. I catch sight of her from peeking behind a wrecked van. She’s trying to look for me. She has no idea what danger she is in. I want to scream at her, tell her to run for her life. Tell her to fight back if she needs to, even if it means ending me. I’d rather that than be stuck as this forever. I try to tell her this, instead I leap out with a snarl. She turns to me and has a horrified look on her face.

“Toby!? My gods is that you!? What did they do to you!?” she said.  
“P-please…. Run!” is all I manage to say, focusing every bit of willpower I have.  
“This isn’t right. I can’t help you alone. I need to find-” Marwha began to say.

The doe leaps out from behind a pile of scrap. She grabs Marwha from behind, putting her arm around Marwha’s neck to hold her in place. Marwha tries to hit back, but her attacks have no effect.

“Do it! Cut her open and end her!” the stranger says as they step out from a hiding spot and stands next to Marwha.

I grab my head and begin hitting myself. Hoping somehow smashing my fist into my head will stop them from controlling me. Trying to resist the rage and bloodlust the stranger is forcing on me. The doe, the stranger, and Marwha are all caught off guard by this. But Marwha realizes this first.

I see her reach into her pocket. She pulls out a stun gun. She had started to carry one ever since the incident with the cult. Marwha turns it on and jabs it into the doe’s face. It hits her just below the left eye. 

The doe releases her grip on Marwha to clutch her face in pain. It wasn’t enough to stun her. Marwha steps away from the doe before turning up the power on her stun gun and jabbing it into the stranger’s side. The stranger and the doe fall to the ground twitching. 

The rage fades away. Likely because they’re in too much pain to focus on influencing me. I regain my composure, Marwha looks at me cautiously. She’s unsure If she should be ready to fight me or not. I pick my words carefully.

“We need to leave!” I said.

I see her smile ever so slightly at this confirmation that I’m still in control. I quickly scoop her up in my arms and effortlessly carry her out of the scrapyard while running at a full sprint. Seems that this monstrous form is good for something after all. It’s mid-afternoon, I do my best to avoid other people. I did get shot last time others saw me after all.

I stop in an alley behind a grocery store. I set Marwha down, she quickly hops away and turns towards me. She looks at what I’ve turned into, she looks almost horrified. I try to keep a respectable distance from her.

“Toby. Is that really you?” she asked.  
“Unfortunately…. yes.” I said.  
“Tell me something only Toby and I would know.” She said.  
“There was that one guy in high school, Joseph. He pretended to be some kind of secret admirer for you because he liked toying with your emotions. So when we found out I used my blessing to make him shit himself in class.” I said.  
“Alright, it’s you. What the hell is going on! Who were those two, what’s happened to you!?” Marwha said.  
“That person in the hoodie is trying to make me into something like that deer. A mindless obedient monster! They think the final step in the transformation is for me to kill you!” I said.  
“The fuck!? Why me?” she said.  
“I don’t know, but I don’t care. We need to put a stop to them now!” I said.  
“I figured as much. My dad has been stopping by to see Placido to try and find you. But your trail went cold a few days ago.” She said.  
“It’s gotta be this damn suppression band. It’s blocking out Placido’s blessing.” I said as I showed her the metal armband.  
“Hold on, lemme get that off.” She said.

Marwha taps the armband and seems to read from whatever her blessing is saying. She begins working on the combination lock, getting the sequence right immediately. The armband clicks and she pulls it off. She tosses it aside and it falls near a pile of trash bags. 

We both sit down and I bring Marwha up to speed with what has happened to me. She uses her blessing on me to get an idea on what my condition is. She is horrified at it since it confirmed everything I had explained to her. Hopefully this also proves that I didn’t intend to say those things to her a week and a half ago. 

“Toby, how can we fix this?” she said.  
“By tearing this damn organ out of my torso! I’m tempted to just shove my claws in there and tear it out myself!” I said.  
“That’s not a good idea. You’ll probably nick something vital. Not to mention any infections or blood loss you could get as a result. We need an actual doctor to take care of that.” she said.  
“Aren’t you learning to be a doctor!?” I said.  
“Well yes but not a surgeon. I’m more for figuring out what’s wrong so the surgeons can know what to cut out.” She said.  
“Well we need to get this thing out of me. Is your dad still in town?” I said.  
“Yeah, he’s been trying to keep in touch with Placido to find you.” She said.  
“Call him, get his K.o.P. friends down here so they can fix me and hopefully kill that bastard.” I said.  
“Could you two not encourage their death? I have business with them.” A familiar voice said.

I looked at the entrance of the alley. The green reptile is there again. But I also notice that Marwha sees them too. It’s not a hallucination after all….

“Sorry to drop in unannounced like this. But you have any idea how hard it has been to keep track of you when you had that thing on your arm? I had to get over here as soon as I could the moment it was off.” they said.


	11. Slow or Quick, Time to Choose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby is given an ultimatum.

I immediately see Toby lunge towards the strange reptile. He tries to jab his claws into their throat. But they just bounce off their scales, the reptile not budging at all. Toby throws a punch but it is effortlessly caught by the reptile’s hand.

“Wait. Have you been thinking I’m…. Oh gods I should have known. Ugh, I was always terrible with this. The other two are much better at it.” They said, seemingly ignoring the attacks Toby made.  
“Huh?” Toby and I say.  
“Look, I’m not that jerk who did this to you. I’m trying to take them down too! I’ve been following you because you’re the only shot I have at them.” They said.  
“What? Wait a minute….” Toby said as he backed away.  
“Sorry for the confusion. I’m under strict orders to reveal as little about myself or my motives as possible. But at this point you’re not going to cooperate if I don’t tell you something.” They said with a shrug.  
“What the hell are you then?” Toby asked.  
“Well one thing I am not is here. You’re talking to a duplicate. The real me is on a different continent. I’m a very busy lizard.” They said.  
“Then what the hell do you want?” Toby said.  
“Rather rude but I understand you’re stressed. You see, the one responsible for your condition is someone that needs to be held accountable for their crime.” They said.  
“The crime of turning Toby into a monster?” I said.  
“No, I don’t deal with that kind of crime. They are wanted for acquiring raw cruor. The gods themselves swore off using the stuff for anything. So how in the world they got some is something I need to solve.” They said.  
“Well shit. They were twitching in the scrapyard not long ago. They’re probably fine now though.” I said.  
“Is that slang for something dirty?” they said.  
“No. I hit them with this!” I say as I pull out my stun gun to show them.  
“Ah. Well they’ll both be coming after you two. Toby needs to kill Marwha to complete the transformation. They won’t let you two go so easily.” They said.  
“Why me though?” I said.  
“You’re sort of Toby’s main reason to avoid turning into a monster. He doesn’t want to leave you all by yourself.” They said.  
“How do you know that?” Toby asked.  
“Anyone who knows your friendship can guess that. That jerk certainly did.” They said.  
“Well. What do we do, how do we stop them?” I asked.  
“Simple. Expose the stranger’s face.” They said.  
“That’s it!? How will that help?” Toby said.  
“Once I see their face. I’ll know their name. Once I know their name, then the ones I work with will know their name too. Once that happens, then all their secrets will be revealed.” They said.  
“That’s too vague. How do we know you’re someone we can trust and isn’t going to use that information for evil?” I said.  
“I’m just doing a job I was asked to do. I put my vacation on hold for this. The Grey Elder doesn’t want this incident to get any worse than it already has. Like you, I’m simply the one for the job.” They said.

I froze up at the reptile so casually mentioning The Grey Elder. Are they someone the elder is using like it did to me? Does helping them make me complicit in this act? I’m already at risk of execution if anyone found out about it. I don’t want two charges of it, much less to get Toby involved too.

“You work for The Grey Elder?” Toby said.  
“Not directly. They came to my boss about this and my boss came to me and now I’m coming to you two.” They said.  
“You know what. I don’t care. If this is what I have to do to get my body back to normal and put a stop to that asshole, then so be it.” Toby said.  
“You sure?” I asked.  
“I just want it to end. That’s all I want.” Toby said.

The reptile nods and reminds us that all we need to do is make the stranger’s face visible. I wish we had known that sooner. I could have unmasked them at the scrapyard. Though if we weren’t in such a rush I probably would have broken their legs with something. Toby told me what they did, they deserve whatever is coming to them. The reptile vanishes the moment I blink.

I ask Toby what their blessings are. He doesn’t know what the stranger’s blessing is since they’ve demonstrated numerous odd abilities. The weird doe however, Toby is certain of her blessing. The ability to teleport by placing marks on things and appearing at those marks. Now that’s a blessing I wouldn’t mind having.

I text my dad, telling him that Toby and the stranger are in town. I had better let him know, despite what the reptile said. But before he can even text back, I notice a blue light behind me. I turn around and it’s still behind me, is it on my back?

Suddenly I’m grabbed from behind. The same doe from the junkyard appeared behind me! Did they put a mark on me when I was in her grasp before? She has me in a bear-hug with one arm and the other one holding her sharpened claws against my throat.

Toby calls out for me before I’m engulfed in light. I then find myself on a remote strip of beach. I think I was here when I was looking for that lyrebird guy I met my first year here. The stranger looks at me, the doe keeping her firm grip on me.

“Wasn’t expecting a student to be carrying a weapon like this.” They said as they pulled the stun gun from my pocket.  
“Being chased through the town by a cult wanting to kill me gave me a bit of an incentive to carry one.” I said as I watched them toss it into the sand.  
“Yeah, that’ll do it. Wait right here.” They said as they backed away.

The stranger looked out at the ocean. Toby was right, I can’t figure out what this person is at all. They look towards me and then back to the ocean again. Then they began talking to themselves.

“Tobias. You are to come to our location and kill your friend. You have twenty minutes. If you attempt to bring the authorities here or refuse to arrive, I shall inject Marwha here with a special blend of cruor. One that is very hostile to her biology. It will result in a prolonged, painful, and inevitable death.” They said.  
“Don’t I get a say in this!?” I said.  
“You are a roadblock for Toby to have purpose in his life. I take no joy in ending you. But sometimes casualties are necessary.” They said.  
“How did you even do this, to him and her? The gods don’t allow certain blessings to exist and something like yours seems like it would fit the bill!” I said.  
“My blessing is being able to inject any substance in my body into things through my fingers. Everything else…. Well I sort of did a trial run on myself before using it on my friend here.” They said.  
“Is that what you are under there, the same as her?” I said as I looked at the doe holding me captive.  
“No. My adjustments are much simpler.” They said.  
“I don’t believe you. Prove you’re still a person under those clothes.” I said.

They looked at me. They stepped closer until our heads were almost touching. I can just barely make out their eyes under those heavily tinted glasses. Their eyes stare into mine.

“Marwha Shinsain. 21 years old, female, primarily of fossa descent. You have an older brother named Achal who is to get married to his fiancé Dacia at the end of this school year following graduation. You are engaged to Arno Glacitus. You both disagree with your engagement on moral grounds and are trying to have it broken up. You are Toby’s childhood friend and you consider him to be your best friend.” They said.  
“Oh yeah, spout facts about me. Real menacing.” I said.  
“I gained all of that by looking through Toby’s eyes. I’ve seen his encounters with the strange reptile. They’re after me. I’ve known this long before I found Toby. And I will sooner kill you and break Toby myself than let that…. thing see my true face.” They said.  
“They’re a weird lizard, so what? You’re just as weird.” I said as I tap my shoe ever so slightly against their shoe. 

They notice the tap and jump away. I see the info window I had opened up through the act. Unfortunately my windows are tethered to the thing they are analyzing, and the window floats away enough where I can’t read the text. They look down at their shoe and then to me.

“You little shit. I had forgotten about your blessing until now. Otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten that close. Trying to use your blessing to find my name are you?” they said.  
“From what they said to me. Knowing your name saves us the trouble of unmasking you.” I said.  
“You’re acting awfully cocky for someone in a life threatening situation.” They said.  
“My life has been in serious danger around three or four times since I started going here. I’m frankly tired of it.” I said.  
“Well here is where it ends.” They said as I hear leaves rustling.

We all turn to see Toby emerge from the foliage. He’s covered in dirt and panting, he must have cut straight through the woods to get here. He looks at me, the doe tightens her grip on me. I can feel the sharpened edge of her claws on my skin, just barely not breaking the surface.

“Toby. Enough of these games. Give Marwha a swift end or I will give her an agonizing slow death.” They said, their fingers forming into long tendrils, ready to inject the cruor into me.  
“You’re a monster.” Toby said.  
“I’m a visionary. I repurpose that which society would have deemed worthless. You should be thanking me.” they said.  
“For endangering innocent people!?” Toby says as he points to me.  
“She’s far from innocent. I heard about the details regarding that cult. She refused the glory they promised her in exchange for her sacrifice. Threw away her precognition abilities too. If she had only listened to them, they might have predicted this coming war. Then I wouldn’t have needed to resort to hiding out from the authorities. You probably would have come to me willingly!” they said.  
“So therefore I deserve to die!?” I said.  
“You had a part in The Grand Design! But you rejected it! I would have chosen you for this experiment if Toby wasn’t here!” they said as they turned to me, just as I wanted.

Fun thing about my windows. They always face me unless I manually turn them away. They also always try to be as close to me as they can when they are far away. So in a situation like this where the window is tethered to their foot, the tether will move to whatever part of the body is closest towards me. In this case, the tip of their snout. Stretching out from the tip of their snout is the tether attached to the window. In the few inches closer it has become, I can make out two words at the top. I say the words calmly to avoid alerting them.

“Helena Jistakk” I say.

Instantly, the green reptile appears behind her. She jumps back from them, the doe holding me moves back too and brings me with her. Helena looks around in panic. Then she looks right at me.

“YOU BITCH!” she says as she lunges towards me with her fingers ready to inject.

But then there is what I can describe only as a sudden geyser of sand. She floats upwards in the air, surrounded by loose sand and a crater below her. Then she falls down with the sand into the crater. Burying most of her near instantly. Her hand and head being some of the only parts above ground. I turn to see Toby nearby and smiling at what is no doubt his work. 

The reptile suddenly appears beside me and the doe. They touch the doe’s arm with a clawed finger. Instantly her grip relaxes and she falls to the ground. I can’t tell if she’s alive or not, but I honestly don’t care at this point. 

“NO! You could have been invaluable to us!” Helena shouts as she struggles to dig herself out.  
“Too bad. Now even though I know your name, I still need to double check.” The reptile said as they walked over to her.

Helena shouted at the reptile not to touch her. But they reach down and tear the glasses and mask off her face. Toby and I see a white-furred rabbit with the same black eyes that Toby and the doe have. She’s no one I’ve ever seen before.

“Well now. It really is you Helena. And here I was thinking you might be the one all the way in Brizza. But there are only so many Helena Jistakks in the world. I would have found you eventually.” They said.  
“You and your boss stay the hell away from me!” she shouted.  
“We would have gladly done that if you hadn’t broken a rule even the gods themselves agreed to follow. You have no one to blame but yourself.” The reptile said.

The reptile touched her head with a claw and she too went limp like the doe did. The reptile stood up and looked at me. They said “Thank you for helping me.” and vanished into thin air. I looked over at Toby. He is lying face first into the sand. I rush over to find that he is simply passed out. I reach into my pocket and see my father has sent me various frantic texts. I call him right away.


	12. Recovery and Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toby recovers from this ordeal and reflects on his situation. But not before meeting someone familiar.

Marwha walks into my hospital room. She’s carrying my phone with her. I haven’t seen it since that creep grabbed me from the K.o.P. facility. I’m glad to have it back after all this time. 

It’s been four days since Helena was arrested. I was quickly taken to the local hospital. The K.o.P. had sent over doctors and had plenty of people there to ensure none of the hospital staff was involved with my treatment. Right now my torso is sore from the recent surgery. Doctors cut that wretched thing out of me. I’ve been on that blood transfusion loop ever since. 

The white fur is changing back to its normal brown. My claws are shrinking as well. I feel more like myself every day. Once I recover from the surgery and the cruor is out of my system, I can leave. 

“Here you go. They found it in that place that jerk was keeping you. There’s not any evidence on it so you can have it back.” Marwha said as she handed me my phone and a charger.  
“Your dad tell you what they’re doing with her and that doe?” I ask.  
“She’s been put in a max security prison. But she and the doe are also forced to undergo the same treatment you are to get rid of the cruor in their systems.” She said.  
“They deserve that for sure.” I said.  
“You feeling okay?” she asked.  
“I’m just glad that is all over. My dad is trying to come down here to see me. Gods know he has been taking this maybe even harder than me.” I said.  
“My dad hasn’t been too thrilled about me getting involved near the end of all that. It’s just like how it was after the cult shit.” She said.  
“Hey. I’m sorry. About what I said during that and for nearly getting you killed.” I said.  
“None of it was your fault. I understand that now. I’m just glad you’re okay.” She said with a smile.  
“Speaking of that. What’s my progress?” I said.  
“Lemme check.” Marwha says as she taps my arm. “You have 15% of the cruor left to go.”  
“That’ll take another day or two. Then I can finally get out of this damn place.” I said.  
“Speaking of what this window is saying…. I remember what you said about why the stranger went after you in the first place. I made sure to read up on reproduction and common issues after I got back. They weren’t lying. You really can’t have children.” She said.

I take a deep breath and slowly let it out. I don’t know if I ever wanted kids. That’s just something I never really considered. But for the school to do this to me because of it? It leaves a sour taste in my mouth.

“Should I drop out?” I said.  
“Wait, what?” Marwha asked.  
“Leave Satvius, go somewhere else.” I said.  
“And give up on the progress you’ve made towards your degree?” she said.  
“My whole life. I just wanted someone I can love. Someone I can share my most intimate and private feelings with. You’re the closest thing I’ve ever had, but that’s just not what I’m looking for.” I said.  
“I never was. Though sometimes I wish I could be, just to help you feel better.” she said.  
“Sometimes I do too. But we both know it wouldn’t work out between us.” I said.  
“Oh gods no. Friends is as far as we can go.” She said with a smile.  
“But back to what I was saying. I’m not sure if I want to stay here or not. You and the new friends I made are great. I enjoy the classes, the campus, and tossing Nicolo off the edge of the arena. But…. I’m not sure.” I said.  
“Well…. You’re what’s been keeping me going through this as well.” Marwha said.  
“I am?” I said.  
“You’re there to comfort me whenever I have a bad day. You stand up to Nicolo for me. Hell, you even saved my life by holding Achal in place during that cult shit.” She said.  
“Oh wow, I did save your life didn’t I?” I said.  
“I won’t stop you. But this school would become unbearable for me without you. So if you leave, I’m leaving too.” Marwha said.  
“You’d really do that?” I ask.  
“I think having my life threatened in town 5 or 6 times since I got here is a valid excuse for my parents.” She said.  
“Heh. Well if you leave then I’ll leave too.” I said.  
“Either way. I’m glad the real Toby is back.” Marwha said.  
“Me too.” I said with a smile.

I eventually get back to Satvius Academy. Thankfully the academy made it so I didn’t have to make up any work for the two weeks I missed. Apparently it took some encouragement from the K.o.P. to make that happen. They claimed I should avoid stressing myself out for now. I won’t argue that one bit.

Everyone was told I was hospitalized for contracting a rare blood poison that took one of my kidneys. The poison caused my heightened aggression and mood swings, so thankfully my outburst at Marwha can be forgiven more easily. I’ve been asked to keep quiet about the truth, which is something I fully intend to try and forget. Maybe there is someone on campus who can just erase those two weeks from my mind. 

Arno and Marwha are still trying to get their engagement broken off. Nicolo is convinced in my weakened state, he could win in a match against me. But fortunately, the school barred me from sparring for at least a month. He was not happy to hear that.

Placido is still with me. Now they won’t move him out until they find a new match for him. Which I honestly love. He clearly isn’t into me, but he’s still someone I can talk to. Plus having a roommate who can generate clothing is really helpful. 

I continued on with school. Trying to leave those dreadful two weeks behind me however I can. And I did, Marwha never brings it up and I haven’t had any nightmares about it or anything. It was all going smoothly until about a month later when I went to Sal’s for lunch.

I’m heading over there alone. Walking along the boardwalk to the end where the restaurant is. I glance at the few tables for outside seating as I get close. And then I see them. The strange reptile from before. Neither me nor Marwha had seen a trace of them since they vanished on the beach. Yet here they are, eating a sandwich with two other people I don’t recognize. A strange looking lady who looks like Marwha in the sense that she looks feline but doesn’t seem to be one herself. The other is a bird with some rather eccentric plumage on their tail feathers. Not peacock level, but certainly noticeable. I notice the lady has a drum sitting beside her on the bench, and the bird is tuning a banjo. I walk up to them, the lizard notices me.

“Oh hey! You’re looking much better!” they said.  
“This the guy you were telling us about?” the bird said.  
“You showed me what he looked like when that was going on, I can see the resemblance in the normal form.” The lady said.  
“Who are these two?” I ask the reptile.  
“Friends of mine. And I guess coworkers as well.” They said.  
“Can I just ask…. What are you?” I said.  
“Like species-wise or just in general?” they said.  
“Just what the fuck are you? And you too mister bird with the banjo. I’m pretty sure you’re the one Marwha has been trying to find ever since you rescued her from that storm!” I said.  
“Yeah, I’m aware. But I have other business to attend to so I haven’t been around much. Tell her there is no need to thank me, knowing she’s alive and well is all I need.” The bird said.  
“Well what about her? Arno told me about some weird marsupial lion lady with a drum he met last year. You told him you worked for Sophist Diogen!” I said.  
“That I do. We all work for the gods.” She said.  
“And The Grey Elder apparently.” I said.  
“They’re not as bad as one would think. But we don’t work with them directly. Our bosses sometimes do though.” The reptile said.  
“Since when are the gods using regular people to work with them? I thought they stopped doing that.” I said.  
“They just stopped bringing more people in. The ones already there kept at it. We’re no different.” The bird said.  
“Well…. Did you at least get what you wanted from that asshole you helped me take down?” I said.  
“Oh yeah. I’ll tell you since you are owed some kind of explanation. During the war, The Congregation was going to do this one plan involving giving raw cruor that was easy to modify to worshippers from other religions so they make monsters and end up destroying themselves. But the war came to an end before it could be set in motion. But the stuff to do it was still out there. The location of which kinda got lost as time went on. Helena must have found it somehow, but thanks to you we found it again and put a stop to it.” The reptile said.  
“That’s it? Those two weeks of hell I went through are all because one of those Congregation shits forgot about something!?” I said, feeling angry.  
“Hey, that’s what happened. Be glad she got overconfident and tried to convert you on her second try. I don’t know if you would have made it out if she had more at her side.” The reptile said.  
“But what about the whole hiding her identity thing? She seemed to know about the rules you were working under.” I said.  
“That’s what’s been bugging me. She knew about you, she had good information about the school too. She knew too much for someone like her. I think she may have had an accomplice.” The reptile said.  
“Who?” I ask.  
“No idea, but whoever it was is long gone. For now at least.” The reptile said.  
“For now? You think they will come back!?” I said.  
“This town, that college. Odd things are always happening here. The Grand Designer themself picked this spot for the academy. I was there to give the order to build here. They’re all about the long term. They don’t make a choice like this without some kind of reason.” The bird said.  
“Any hint as to what that is?” I ask.  
“Doesn’t concern you. The less people know about their plans, the harder it is for people to screw them up.” The bird said as the other two nodded in agreement.  
“Now I suggest you head off. We’ve told you all we are allowed to say. Which has been plenty. Your troubles with cruor are over. So therefore, the same can be said for our business with you.” The reptile said.  
“Well then…. Thank you.” I said.

I turn to my right to walk into the restaurant when something occurs to me. The bird said he was there when the school wasn’t built yet. This school is almost as old as this country. How the hell is he alive? Agelessness and immortality are blessings the gods don’t allow to exist!

I turn around to go ask them. But the table is clear. No one nearby, the table completely clean as if it hadn’t even been used today. Damn it, this is going to confuse me the rest of my life isn’t it? 

I sigh and continue my original plan. I order some food and a drink and sit down at a booth all by myself. I slowly work away at my food as I let my mind wander. Eventually I end up at a memory of mine.

I’m loading up my luggage into the back of Achal’s car. Today is the day I leave for Satvius Academy. I put the last of my things in the trunk. I turn around to look at my home, my dad is standing outside watching me. 

I walk over to him, he’s trying not to cry. He has raised me by himself for the majority of my life. Every choice he made in the last 18 years was for me.

And now here I am. A legal adult and going off to one of the best schools around. I give him a hug and he hugs me back the hardest he ever has. I ask him what he’ll do when I’m gone. He says he’ll try dating again. Hopefully to find someone to make the house less empty when I’m not here. I wish him luck.

Then I get in the car, we drive off, I go to school, I come back for the summer and holidays, that routine repeats for the next year, and then the year after that this happens. This little crisis has really shaken me up. I’m never going to forget these two weeks. Neither will my dad. Sitting helpless at home, unable to do anything as the only information he gets on me are texts from my friends.

I only hope he has found someone to be with. I don’t know because I never asked and he never brought it up. But he could use someone to get him through this. As for me, while I may have Placido to at least make my dorm not feel as empty, and I have Marwha to confide in as a friend, I’m still without someone I can be truly close to…. Maybe I can find someone online.


End file.
